Weight and See: Song of the mouth
By Contributor‘The Biggest Loser: Couples’ recap, episode 8
biggestloser.wadeonbirmingham.com
By Ginny
The “Biggest Loser” contestants are all sent home. Nine-way defeat? Nope, just shore leave for our intrepid dieters.
Out in the wild, Roger Shultz of Enterprise has to decide everything on his own. (No more Bama Slammer cohort Trent, sniff.) Will he listen to Mr. Blue Bob on his shoulder, or follow Br’er Rabbit into the briar patch?
Everybody’s got a laughing place, after the jump …
Two months gone: Players are heading home for mini-reunions. It’s a busy week, what with the producers earnestly compiling lists of the worst foods to stock for overeaters on a day pass from rehab, and the editors gleaning “Blind Date” reruns for fun ways to punch up the episode.
The initial homecomings are pretty unsurprising: Nine people walk through nine doors to cheers and balloons, followed by an interview with a relevant loved one who verifies, “Hey, they’re skinnier!”
Check it: Only Roger’s welcome committee is so elaborate it requires a tent and the collective back yards of an entire subdivision. Roll Tide, yo.
I left town for eight years. My welcome-home party
had five guests, and I was glad to get them.
Penalty: excessive celebration.
Roger hugs his cute wife Paige and
the current Alabama placekicker.
Once everyone’s home, we see how they handle the temptations of life off the ranch, which includes insane amounts of sugary, fatty foods at every turn. We have four basic responses: the Mark, the Roger, the Bernie and the Paul.
The Mark: Hypocritically snatch treats from children’s mouths with no warning or explanation, making them feel guilty for eating food provided by parents. Similar players: Jay.
Just give back the doughnut, and Daddy will still love you.
The Roger: Internalize lessons learned from trainer, materializing them as encouraging presence over shoulder. Similar players: Uncle Remus.
On other shoulder, my angel Jillian.
Worst. Spotter. Ever.
The Bernie: Enjoy time off and try to incorporate lessons into everyday life. Similar players: Brittany, Maggie, Dan, Kelly.
Mmm, chocolate named after me … where can I rub it?
The Paul: Eat everything in sight, dodge phone calls, and lie to current girlfriend about relationship with ex-wife. Similar players: After substituting “eat” with “drink/smoke,” every guy I’ve ever dated.
Here, her eyes are literally closed.
Maybe that’s how she manages to find him so sexy.
The challenge, a leap/duck affair, made absolutely no difference in the eventual winner.
No penalty: celebration completely justified.
The weigh in: We see how well these tactics have worked for the remaining players. For Roger, quite well indeed, as he drops a solid 16 pounds.
Blue completely routs black, losing 5.67 percent to 2.42 percent. Whether Mark and Jay’s obsessively structured habits pay off in the long term is anyone’s guess, but black has to send a member home tonight.
And it’s Paul, who rankled teammates by holding on to his old yellow shirt and letting his insecurities keep him from bonding with teammates.
Which method is the best long-term solution for weight maintenance: the more strident attention to food and exercise, or the moderate mash-up of home life and healthy habits?
“The Biggest Loser: Couples” airs at 7 p.m. Tuesdays on NBC 13.
Previous: A single pound makes all the difference.
Next: The boys in blue win a trip to Vegas that ends in tears. As most do.
Also:
- Recaps at Television Without Pity
- And more recaps at the Diet Column
- Even Project Resolution adopting the couples format
Ginny, pop culture and fashion maven, dares you to read her blog, whiskey. tango. foxtrot., at blog.myspace.com/whiskeytangofoxtrotblog.
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Shape up: more “Biggest Loser” at biggestloser.wadeonbirmingham.com.
Sunday, March 2, 2008, 7:25 am
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