Wade’s 101: Haiku retrospective 41
By Wade Kwon[Share on Twitter]
- business class karaoke
A selection of
Sting hits and white wine spritzers
for a few bucks more. - mystical origin
“Doctor Strange” best scene?
When the radioactive
magician bites him. - poll watcher
This is a test that
allows cheating: Copy off
of my ballot, please. - put up, show up, count up
One vote, your vote, could
make a difference. But only
if you turn it in. - the political minority
To be commander
in chief requires little
more than white power. - star-spangled spectacle
This election has
certainly brought out the best
in us, hasn’t it? - the fight goes on
We can learn so much
from vets, especially now
we are all soldiers. - so heavy a hidden burden
Guilt corrupted his
love into a force for his
misguided penance. - dixie is burning
Precipitation
has no participation
in irrigation. - denigration by any means necessary
Racism is like
pornography: I will know
it when I see it. - surge of the non-believers
They attack non-whites
and non-men to make their cruel
non-points about hate. - politics 2016
Vicious attacks. Cruel
policy. Lie outright. It’s
how the game is played. - dry spell after dry spell
A single raindrop
ended the long drought, starting
a new one for months. - no soul required
Nothing ever dies
when poisonous nostalgia
takes on zombie form. - in good company
Settling in for
a winter of good books, good
wine and alone time. - the new job market
Safe space officer.
Reality host turned prez.
Helicopter bro. - this little piggy went to market.com
See services ship.
Click, buy, click, buy. Shop, Jane, shop.
Scurry, drones, scurry. - bulletproof funny bone
If we don’t shoot the
court jester first, we’re in for
some hilarity. - expect the unexpected
Let hope fly out the
window. Receive candid views
and misguided help. - around the big table
Pass the cornbread, pie,
turkey, gravy, dressing, rolls,
green beans, cranberries … - a dose of black friday
Can a new blender
make family squabbling and
job stress go away? - plus al’s pancake world
Visit Stars Hollow
for its new sewer system
and its free parking. - beyond borders
Each tribe shuddered at
unity and withdrew to
a safer distance. - water water nowhere
Please take this gift of
a single raindrop and share
it among millions. - the world’s most popular dish
Two parts hydrogen,
one part oxygen. Serve fresh
from cloud containers. - the conditions today and tomorrow
Drought and wildfires
to tornados, thunderstorms
and flash floods like that. - dust bowl
Miles of scorched earth in
a forest of parched pines, all
subject to a spark. - prescription for downfall
Demonize your foe.
Let no one reach you with love
or reason or trust. - hard times in rural arctica
Many out-of-work
elves make ends meet with odd jobs
and reindeer poaching. - look up and fall
As you drop from the
plane, your body spins through the
crushing roar of sky. - canopy deployed
See the land stretch out
forever, looming larger
while drifting along. - disinformationally misinformed
We made up stuff to
terrify ourselves and now
we do it for you. - ripped from the headlines
Tight race now for the
Pulitzer in the cate-
gory of fake news. - making biscuits
Pat the dough with a
gentle touch, then cut it up
with a jelly jar. - burn all the teachers
Education ain’t
taught me nothin’ ‘cept how book
learnin’ don’t pay bills. - bodies at rest
Delightful slumber
awakens rejuvena-
tion in every cell. - walk it off
Whether a mild sprain,
wind knocked out of you or a
severe concussion. - the price of binging
Do we savor when
we gorge upon things meant to
be consumed slowly? - that counts
The best gift giver
in the world relaxed with his
loud ties and cheap mugs. - rip 2016
Yes, the Grim Reaper
loves meeting celebrities
and boosting their fame. - to ramble
Let passion burst forth
as a torrent of pretty
words and swift musings. - may the franchise be with you
I’ll probably live
to see another 50
more “Star Wars” movies. - why should meatbags have all the fun?
Let’s hope some of the
self-driving cars weave in and
out of tight traffic. - out of towels
Throw it in once the
day is done, the game is lost,
and all hope is gone. - the mad dash
Delivery missed.
Last-minute shopping trip with
big crowds and no time. - flavors of friendship
Animals can out-
fox biology; humans
can’t trounce bigotry. - peace on earthlings
The stillness comes form
within. A breath, a moment,
a pause to reflect. - five minutes in heaven
No more nerves, no more
palpitations. Feeling all
at once and nothing. - strength from passivity
Thoughts come and go. Pain
subsides. Future and past are
acknowledged. All is. - a preview of the 2017 holiday season
Anyone caught with
the Christmas spirit will be
held in detention. - in lieu of snow
May all your days be
merry and bright. May all your
Christmases be white. - tis better to give in than to regift
The return isn’t
an unkindness but the best
do-over we get. - as the night goes
Darkness creeps along
the edges of the homestead,
wants to be let in. - the fisher queen
The princess of the
galaxy, force of wit and
charm, long may she reign. - reapin’ ain’t easy
Grim comes with the job,
but some years are a bounty
of celebrity. - business causal
The frenemies in
the office were catty, but
in a polite way. - it’s almost midnight somewhere
Live each day like it’s
the last day of the year: in
a rush to party. - never too early to break some resolutions
We’ll all be a tad
leaner, thriftier, calmer,
taller, nicer. … Nah. - selling points
If you like features
that up the price but not the
fun, check out this deal … - lies, all lies
Everyone talks a-
bout fake news, but no one does
a thing about it. - dash it all
The GPS voice
told him, “Drive recklessly,” and
he blindly followed. - you know those lights were bright on broadway
There are not many
who remember. They say a
handful still survive. - asynchronous communication
I called. She emailed
back. I tried a text. And then
she faxed me over. - precipitation buffet
Rain falls more harshly
as ice pellets, more gently
as dainty snowflakes. - shut-ins for life
Drones drop off supplies,
while we binge-watch everything.
What’s cabin fever? - the limits of family togetherness
Maybe the kids can
color for the next few days:
books, walls, whatever. - hurry up, climate change
My Southern chalet
will triple in value as
a beachfront cottage. - don’t matter
Vaccines, lady parts,
qualifications, gay folk,
people of color. - does matter
Money, self-interest,
power, revenge, privilege,
winning arguments. - defining moment
A chance to focus
on the things that matter while
discarding nonsense. - washington or bust
Cheer on the peaceful
change of power or decry
the ruler to be. - words, actions and change
In Birmingham, John
Lewis and Freedom Riders
were met with brute force. - a legacy of vigilance
Do we stand with King
in working toward a more
inclusive future? - the diner at the end of the world
A long wait, but the
flapjacks and burgers are worth
the armageddon. - all winter in a day 2017
The snowman waited
for Margot till he dropped from
hyperthermia. - may all your days be circus days
The clowns shed some tears.
The trapeze artists flip out.
The ringmaster bows. - america, my home sweet home
From the mountains to
the prairies to the oceans
white with foam, God bless. - rockin’ in the free world
A warnin’ sign on
the road ahead … sayin’ we’d
be better off dead. - finally the tables are starting to turn
Don’t you know, talkin’
’bout a revolution. It
sounds like a whisper. - this haiku kills fascists
As they stood there, I
stood there asking, Is this land
made for you and me? - a strange and bitter crop
Pastoral scene of
the gallant South: the bulging
eyes and twisted mouth. - can’t bring myself to do what it is you think i should
Too late to make it
right. Probably wouldn’t if
I could. ‘Cause I’m mad. - make love, smoke kush, try to laugh hard and live long
That’s the antidote.
You defeat the devil when
you hold on to hope. - shortcuts to shortcuts
Soon, we will be so
efficient that pushing a
button is too much. - the newer colossus
I come from a pair
of immigrant parents. Born
here, waving in more. - america the dutiful
We are a young and
sometimes foolish country, but
we may just yet shine. - were all those harry potter books for naught?
World of magic to
guide us against fear and hate.
Rowling is brassed off. - a piteous domain
And when he saw the
breadth, he wept for there were no
more worlds to ruin. - ready, aim, splatter
Paint on my floor, my
clothes, my hands, my toes, my hair
and some on the walls. - actions, not words
Don’t argue. Do. Don’t
simmer. Do. Don’t hesitate.
Do. Don’t matter? Do. - a hasty virtual retreat
I am leaving this
group text message, and I am
never coming back. - paperback stall
The faded bookmark
patiently waits for progress
amidst the pages. - catlike reflexes
Go to the party
or stay in? Go out or stay
in? Go or stay? Hmm … - the future of health care
Laughter is the best
medicine available
to uninsured groups. - push for this, push for that
The add-on buttons
on the fridge summon extra
diapers, funds causes. - platinum cabinet
The plutocratic
cabal made sure to rob more
from the poor each day. - upon reflection
We see ourselves in
lies more damaging than those
in any mirror. - absurdly awake
While away the late
night with light tossing, heavy
turning, ugly dawn. - coping strategies
Wine, deep breathing, walks
outside, comfort food, screaming
into a pillow. - the 17 most offensive syllables you’ll read today
I wrote this poem
without any regard for
the clicks it will get. - the secrets of the kitchen
All the recipes
look so good. After a pause,
they went for takeout.
• • •
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Sunday, February 19, 2017, 12:06 am
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