Wade’s 101: Haiku retrospective 48
By Wade Kwon[Share on Twitter]
- synaptic revolution
The voice inside my
head shouts at me (and others):
“Fight, goddammit, fight!” - the twilight of america
Where once all (white) men
were created equal, now
they’re the master race. - the best jazz comes from montana
The best jazz comes from
Montana, where the beats drop
all around the clock. - 400 characters or 4,000
Just how long should a
password be when companies
get hacked anyway? - voters of a certain age
Young people don’t vote.
Old people do. And make bad
picks. Old people win. - a holly jolly halloween
Front yards aglow with
inflatable ghosts and troupes
of dancing pumpkins. - and the shiny goes to
All awards are trite
and egoistic except
for the ones I win. - dressed to thrall
A great costume sparks
envy and awe among those
stuck in basse couture. - within one’s means
The problem with a
budget is window shopping
becomes obsession. - out of zany, one
As long as we keep
the old, the infirm, the odd
out of sight, we’ll cope. - the deep satisfaction of a cake maker
Turning out layer
after layer of golden
baking perfection. - a call to disarm
Why fight when we can?
Why fight when we can talk? Why
fight when we can love? - 4k 2bad
Formats are higher
in resolution but boast
exact same plot holes. - pumpkin spice infestation
It seeps into your
pores, turning you into a
bright wack-o’-lantern. - a dog when someone rings the doorbell
Alert! Alert! A
stranger is coming in. Let
me sniff him and pounce. - the loner at the patio bar
The long drawn face tied
to slumping shoulders. How life
has beaten him down. - at the corner of fourth and 18th
No better way to
meet people than at the scene
of a big car crash. - disguise discovery
This mask we wear comes
off but once a year to show
the world our true selves. - cuter looters
At the door are quite
a few short weirdos looking
for candy to snatch. - squiggles and sticks
Each punctuation
mark has a name. Who knows what
they are period. - retail ghost town
The empty storefronts
interrupted by a vape
shop and boutique gym. - the paycheck-to-paycheck stranglehold
Ignore bill, ignore
bill, pay a little, do with
less, then start again. - no campaigning within 30 feet
With eager waves and
greetings, they make a last-ditch
effort to win votes. - from all sides
Tribalism takes
its hold on the extremes and
squeezes the middle. - either/or
A few hours of
voting can transform the world
for better or worse. - all according to plan
The frustration of
being in control while not
controlling a thing. - down and out
A broken man waits
on the street for a wish that
is never granted. - a podcast a day
History, local
stuff, serial killers fill
the ears and the minds. - broken pen pals
Accumulation
on one side of messages,
postcards and letters. - veterans on parade
Riding the floats and
waving to throngs of grateful,
proud Americans. - hobo king
He rules the rails with
dignity, compassion for
all who seek jobs, jaunts. - the group text
A thread of catty
remarks and blackmail pics to
keep everyone sane. - first heard
Voices. All distinct.
The light above. Faint footsteps.
Blood pumps in the ears. - the text of undoing
His motivation
revealed itself in a few
poorly chosen words. - my other super power
Picking the item
at McDonald’s that they’re out
of today only. - the universe in its infinite diversity
On other planets,
do they see us? Do they want
to talk? Or hide out? - deep fried turkey
The only thing deep-
fried on Thanksgiving was the
chef’s unlucky leg. - back to shells and disks
The chip is maybe
secure except when thieves scan
it in your wallet. - the cycle of resistance
Every day is a
new fight. Can’t back down. Every
day is a new fight. - the airing of blessings
Look for the people
who make your life better to
express gratitude. - a guide to thanksgiving dinner
Break bread and tell tales
round the table. Share wisdom
and promote world peace. - 17 rhymes
Cats hats rats bats tats
mats gnats fats pats stats lats vats
slats gats flats brats prats. - quantify everything
Count all the oaks, fish,
gulls, rocks, cups, stars, cars, peaks, caves,
kites, dawns, dunes, breaths, souls. - a cost of free speech
A hidden army
vets obscene and bloody pics
for our social play. - cartoon obsession
So much joy from a
set of squiggly lines and a
troupe of strong voices. - beauty and wonder
To gaze at the blue
sky with an armada of
clouds shaped like tacos. - scribbling towards ecstasy
It takes a little
bit of practice each day to
become a writer. - radical acceptance
This is our moment.
Circumstances don’t matter.
It is what it is. - the coming frost
Soon, the harvested
fields make way for death, decay
and the coming frost. - climate charge
Snowflakes in autumn.
Has winter solstice become
too commercialized? - death at our own hands
More see the only
way out is through suicide.
Hope has gone away. - tinder, but for swingin’ kringles
Those dying malls can’t
support Santa’s gigs, but an
app can summon him. - everywhere but inside of the eyelids
Tired, exhausted, worn
out, run down, sleepy, tuckered
out, zombified, dead. - the holiday rush
… three smashed cars, two wreck-
er jobs and a traffic jam
on the interstate. - the surly server
Her feet ache, her shifts
go forever and her damn
diners forget tips. - rabble with a cause
A protest is not
to reach consensus, but to
speak truth to power. - the perks of being a working stiff
Sleep comes easily
to exhausted souls trying
to remain afloat. - space opera
A musical on
changing interstellar trade
policy and droids. - the baby says hi
He toddles up to
strangers to welcome them with
no guise but kindness. - the monsoon
Whoever is still
praying for rain, please stop else
we drown on our land. - choose patience
The hurry-up-and-
go method gives way to a
moment for breathing. - youtube radicalization
Watch a video,
then three more, then parrot back
hateful talking points. - songs and sweets
A time for candy
canes and mistletoe, thoughtful
gifts and caroling. - ai is my co-pilot
The long road to self-
driving cars will be littered
with bodies and wrecks. - forget hell
I had a better
verse in mind, but I didn’t
write it down in time. - held up at the north pole port of entry
Santa may delay
his journey to sort out some
weird tariff issues. - they’ve even infected this stanza
The Russians spared no
expense in bringing chaos
to other nations. - the gentleman in front of western
A looping voice box
lures busy shoppers to the
wheelchair bodega. - my bully
You can’t damage me.
In every aspect, I am
my own worst bully. - the touch of winter
Dark days, darker nights,
a biting cold coupled with
peaceful lifelessness. - the heart of contempt
The fragile white male
ego, a foul entity
to behold, to know. - sugar cookies and crocheted stockings
The best thing about
holiday traditions is
making up new ones. - showtime from the apollo
They looked back upon
the earth in awe at the small
blue marble called home. - bundle of hope
A package, neatly
wrapped, beneath the twinkling lights
waiting for a child. - brick and mortal
No more bargain hunts.
No more long return lines. Just
click, wait, knock, it’s done. - art as a commodity
What color palette?
What themes? Which artist’s style? What’s
your spending limit? - maybe next year
Catch up on some sleep.
Finish clearing the garage.
Learn a new language. - missing sense
My dog has no nose!
— Oh heavens, how does he smell?
(A pause.) Just awful. - unable to escape
Who designed such a
fiendish trap that would keep me
so paralyzed? … … Me. - in closing
All good things must come
to an end. Fortunately,
all bad things as well. - the beginning
The road ahead is
long, maybe dangerous and
ready to traverse. - home for the holi-half-day
She drove night and day
across states to be with her
kids for 12 hours. - a little rain
A light breeze became
a little rain. That never
stopped. The world flooded. - malodorous realm
I bet the worst thing
about eternity in
hell is the odor. - a year for setbacks and setforwards
She delighted in
her many resolutions,
kept and otherwise. - rah deal
Students stopped going
to games and settled for score
updates on their phones. - found in the mail
The box of goods wound
its way across the country
by way of Japan. - ballad of the porch pirate
Before, burglars had
to break inside. Now, they just
swipe our packages. - comparison is the thief of joy
Cupcakes are fancy
muffins. Hotels are taller
motels. All is lost. - where ideas come from
A hidden part of
the lizard brain that defies
logic and reason. - the moral lesson
Not one to absorb
but to put into practice
over and over. - everyone is overqualified
We are good drivers,
with above-average brains
and perfect manners. - the perfect crime
Don’t cry because it’s
over. Smile because you got
away with something. - calibration dish
If they can’t make a
good cashew chicken, then they
won’t see me again. - modern civics
Grab all you can get.
The ends justify the means.
And also meanness. - to-done list
It can be somewhat
satisfying to cross off
items from ’16. - conversations in the air
Ambling down the street,
chatting with distant friends through
hidden earpieces. - the heap down the street
We all end up like
so much junk on the curb, sent
to oblivion. - the new new fandom
Love what you love, but
not to the detriment of
others’ enjoyment. - writing a hit song
Catchy tune with a
memorable chorus, plus
lots of tambourine. - winter emergency survival kit
Light the fire. Pour
the wine. Stay inside. Cuddle
under the blankets.
• • •
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