Higher straits: We’re suckers for pretty lady who can sing. That’s why we’re excited whenever hometown gal Emmylou Harris releases a new CD. Her latest, "All the Roadrunning," is a collaboration with Mark Knopfler of Dire Straits. Emmylou says, “I’m lucky enough to have a core audience that will zig and zag with you so you don’t have to put out the same thing record after record. If there’s any pressure at all, it’s that your fans are expecting you to zig and zag. They want to see what you’re going to do next. They want you to follow your muse.” Yes we do, Emmy, yes we do.

• Reviews at Metacritic: a favorable 63 out of 100.

• Maverick Alabama native Harris teams with rocker Knopfler [Associated Press]

Mail bonding: You’ve seen the movie, now read the letters. Author Truman Capote spent a portion of his childhood with family in Monroeville. A new permanent exhibit features letters from Capote to his favorite aunt in Alabama and rare family photos. In a 1959 letter, he writes, “Yes, it is true that Nelle Lee is publishing a book. I liked it very much. She has real talent.” He’s referring to the classic tale, “To Kill a Mockingbird,” by his childhood friend, Harper Lee. Since the 2005 release of biopic “Capote,” more visitors are heading to the town of 7,000. Also of note, another Capote pic, “Infamous” is due later this year with Sandra Bullock(!) as Lee.
• Unseen Capote: Letters to aunt, rare photos part of display [Associated Press]

Talladega days: Will Ferrell was on hand for Sunday’s rained-out portion of the Aaron’s 499 at Talladega to plug “Talladega Nights: The Ballad of Ricky Bobby” and serve as grand marshal. Part of the filming took place at the Superspeedway last fall, and the movie is due out Aug. 4. As Ricky says, “If you ain’t first, you’re last.” Probably funnier in the movie.
• Will Ferrell stays busy at Aaron’s 499 [Associated Press]

Also:

• State bird flu plan: Shoot, deep-fry, then eat
• Arts groups stock up on liquor for cultural boozefests
• Only two shopping days left till Cinco de Mayo

• • •

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L is for layoffs: Facing a possible $15 million deficit in the next budget, the Birmingham school system is firing 76 teachers. The move will save $3.8 million, and more will come through retirements and attrition. Superintendent Wayman Shiver Jr. said that the system actually has 130 teachers more than needed. The teachers union pointed out that administrators could have been cut instead or in addition, but the next round of firings will be staff (custodial, kitchen, transportation). At least someone at Birmingham schools can do math.
• City schools lay off 76 teachers [Birmingham News]

Estate of affairs: People are always sticking up for the little guy, but what about the wealthy — can’t something be done to make sure they can make ends meet? Worry no more. The estate tax, or so-called “death tax,” is set to return in 2011, robbing dead millionaires of piles of cash for failing to breathe. That’s discrimination. Let’s look at a typical American family, like the Harberts of Birmingham. Raymond, a hard-working CEO, would have to pay $585 million in estate taxes if his dear mother Marguerite (God forbid) should die today, leaving him with barely $1 billion. That’s hardly enough to cover the funeral. But Raymond has kicked in $500,000 with other patriots to convince Congress to permanently repeal the estate tax. Won’t you donate $500,000, too, to this worthy cause?
• Harbert wealth targets estate tax [Birmingham News]

Bow-w-w-w-w-w-wl!!!!: Due to the critical shortage of bowl games, the NCAA approved four more post-season bowl games, including one at Birmingham’s Legion Field on Dec. 23. The other games are the BCS National Championship Game and ones in Toronto and Albuquerque, N.M. Hey, isn’t Toronto in Canada? Damn NAFTA. Anyway, the Birmingham Bowl will pit the No. 8 team from Conference USA with the No. 9 team from the Big East. OK, we admit that we’re guessing on the which teams will be coming out of those conferences, but if we’re lucky, really lucky, they’ll have a combined record of 12-12 and large contingents of indiscriminate, free-spending, drunken fans. And don’t worry about parking or concessions: We know a few ex-teachers who’ll be happy to serve as cheap labor city ambassadors.

• NCAA approves The Birmingham Bowl [Birmingham News]

Also:

• City plans to sell off excess ozone to airy locales
• Rain delays force extended infield wet T-shirt contest
• Remodeled restaurant still smells like fried ham

• • •

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Art all around: Went down to Linn Park earlier today to check out the happenings at the 23rd annual ONB Magic City Art Connection. The weather is great today, but could be rainy late Saturday and all day Sunday. This free festival runs from 10 a.m. to 6 p.m. and offers plenty of choices for art, children’s activities, food vendors and musical entertainment, Also, Corks and Chefs takes place from 1 to 5 p.m. Saturday and Sunday, offering a sampling of Birmingham’s finest cuisine for $30. Embrace the art, even if you can’t afford it all.
• ONB Magic City Art Connection

Treasures in their attics: Looking for a bargain? How about 100,000 of them? The Junior League of Birmingham is having its annual Bargain Carousel fund-raiser, a self-proclaimed “1,000-family garage sale,” at 3500 Sixth Ave. S. on Southside. It’s $5 to enter from 9 a.m. to noon Saturday, and free from then on, till 4 p.m. Saturday and from 1 to 5 p.m. Sunday, when all items are half-price. Proceeds go to the league’s work on 37 community projects with nonprofit organizations around town. If someone sees a nice set of potholders, grab 'em for us.
• Bargain Carousel

Gentlemen, start your inching: If pretty paintings and second-hand cribs seem, well, rather subdued, head east to Talladega. It’s race weekend, with the Aaron’s 312 on Saturday and the Aaron’s 499 on Sunday. (When it gets to the Aaron’s 672 … sell!) It may be guts and gunning it that win races, but the science of cheating and/or fine-tuning can give a driver enough of an edge to claim victory. That’s why our Chevy Impala has rear spoilers and trick shock absorbers.
• Keeping ’em honest [Birmingham News]

Also:

• Stranded senior citizens hitchhike to bingo hall, tattoo parlor
• New supermarket attracts the hungry, the coupon clippers, the wanderers
• Next thing you know, it’ll be May, then June

• • •

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I put my thing down, flip it and reverse it: The state jobless rate is at an all-time low. Officials and experts credit a growing economy and the automotive industry. In Jefferson County and Birmingham-Hoover, rates fell to 3.3 and 3.1 percent, with restaurants leading the way with 800 new jobs. Good news for job seekers, bad news for companies trying to fill positions.
• Alabama jobless rate falls [Montgomery Advertiser]

Putting along: It’s always been known as the Bruno’s Memorial Classic, a senior pro golf tournament and charity event, and it’s always been at Greystone. Next week, the Regions Charity Classic takes over in the 15th year, and it’ll be at Renaissance Ross Bridge Golf Resort and Spa. The tournament has raised millions for area charities and claims a $20 million economic boost to the metro area. Plus, Chi Chi.
• Regions, Ross Bridge lay claim to golf classic [Birmingham Business Journal]

Setting Stages: The lineup is mostly set for City Stages 2006. Hip-hop is out, and reggae is in as Sean Paul headlines the Saturday night bill on the Miller Lite Stage. Also announced: Trapt, Shinedown, Herman’s Hermits and the Grassroots. They join previously announced acts Allman Brothers Band, Cameo, Morris Day and the Time, John Hiatt, Los Lonely Boys, Marty Stuart and his Fabulous Superlatives, Hank Williams Jr. and Yellowcard. The festival takes place June 16-18 in downtown Birmingham; advance three-day passes are $35 and $40 starting May 12.

• The Strokes plays a benefit concert May 23 at Sloss Furnaces, the same night a certain Birmingham singer may be competing in the final two for the “American Idol” crown.
• City Stages’ newest competitor? Bonnaroo.

• Reggae star Sean Paul joins City Stages lineup [Birmingham News]

Also:

• Pension fund turns out to be Confederate money, coupons for hugs
• Birthday celebration left to complete chance
• We don’t know what to make of condo fever, either

• • •

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Red state mutiny: When the Blue States are mad, who cares? But when the reddest of the Red States is unhappy, look out. A majority of Alabamians surveyed said the war in Iraq isn’t worth it, according to the latest survey by the Alabama Education Association’s Capital Survey Research Center. The results: 51 percent said no, while nearly 40 percent said yes, with a margin of error of 3.5 percentage points. Previous surveys showed declining support for the war, but this survey is the first with a majority against the current military action. But then, it’s never been about public opinion, has it?
• Statewide poll finds disfavor with Iraq war [Birmingham News]

Bang for your bucks: What’s the price of an eye? Or for 21 operations? If you’re Emily Lyons, the nurse who was nearly killed in the 1998 bombing of the New Woman All Woman clinic on Birmingham’s Southside, it’s 57 bucks and change. Although convicted bomber Eric Rudolph was ordered to pay $2.3 million in restitution among all of his bombing victims, the reality is serial murder just doesn’t pay like it used to. Mrs. Lyons, may we suggest running for county commission?
• Bombing victims get pittance from Eric Rudolph year after plea [Associated Press]

Matthew! 22! 15! Hut hut hike!: WWJD? He’d call for a wide right for a short gain to make the first down. Or, he’d simply market himself on “pro” football jerseys. A North Carolina newspaper columnist has taken issue with the Birmingham Steeldogs upcoming Faith Night, or more specifically, jerseys with Scripture references from Birmingham-based Christian Throwbacks. Rob Daniels writes: “We have suspected it all along, and now it has been confirmed: The Birmingham Steeldogs are God’s Team.” Pretty funny, until you realize Daniels will burn in hell for all eternity. All for mocking our deep abiding faith in football God.
• Rob Daniels: Religious jerseys fit poorly in pro games [Greensboro (N.C.) News & Record.com]

Freedom from speech: An Alabama self-described peace activist has been receiving death threats for her online movies (more like slideshows) with anti-Bush or anti-war-in-Iraq themes. Ava Lowery has made more than 70 movies for her site, Peace Takes Courage, including one movie called “WWJD?” that she submitted for the Huffington Post Contagious Festival film contest. Among the e-mailed accolades she received: “It’s people like you who need to fucking die and get raped while your corpse rots in the sun.” Did we mention she’s 15? Nice.
• Animation Producer Gets Ugly Slurs [The Progressive]

Also:

• Developer eyes bunny sanctuary for garden homes, strip club
• Gardendale movie theater expected to show only family-friendly fare, fold by year’s end
• In case of auditor, seek tax shelter in basement in Bahamas

• • •

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Touched by a devil: Birmingham-based Eternal Word Television Network knowingly employed a priest and self-admitted pedophile for seven years. The Rev. Real Bourque, who started at the religious cable network in 1991, remained employed until 2002, even after receiving treatment at a program for abusive priests in the mid-’90s. Borque has never been charged with any crimes. As pointed out in the article, the EWTN Web site advocates “severe punishment” for such a transgression.

The 78-year-old retiree could still face prosecution if a witness comes forward. Bourque, seen here as a speaker at a religious youth retreat in June 2002, resides in Illinois but has worked or lived in Maine, Maryland, Massachusetts, New Hampshire and Washington, DC. Holy moly.
• Alabama-based Catholic network kept abusive priest on staff [Associated Press]

Shell game: Think your ballot counts? Maybe, but not as much as your big buckin’ checkbook. Political action committees not only grease the wheels of Alabama campaigns, but also hide who their true donors are. PAC money makes up 44 percent of campaign funds in major state races, nearly $4 million. One Tuscaloosa accountant has raised a quarter of that through six PACs, with big chunks coming from lawyers and teachers. All thanks to a loophole in state law — and a ruling from then Attorney Gen. Don Siegelman. Anyone wanna form a PAC with us?
• PACs often mask who’s behind gift [Birmingham News]

Thank you for smirking: Birmingham’s crackdown on smoking in restaurants is a year old — and results are mixed. Some owners are reporting no effect, while others have seen a drop in business to towns without the ban. The Birmingham law prohibits smoking in public places, except bars and lounges. Meanwhile, small towns such as Luverne, Cottonwood and Headland have passed their own smoking bans.
• Smoking bans catch fire – and some heat [Birmingham News]

Also:

• Young professionals fight to be heard, then say nothing
• Teachers’ dirty looks running in short supply near end of school year
• Next week: Iced Tea Turnoff Week

• • •

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Update: Chris McNair, along with others, was found guilty this afternoon of bribery and conspiracy. The trial has attracted attention, not only for the $1 billion sewer debacle which McNair supervised as a Jefferson County commissioner, but also because he’s known to the world as father of Denise McNair, one of the four girls killed in the 1963 KKK bombing of the Sixteenth Street Baptist Church. Possible sentences range from probation to prison time.

A dome deal?: The Birmingham City Council is committing $264 million over the next 30 years to expansion of the Birmingham-Jefferson Convention Complex — including plans for a domed stadium. The city was spending $5 million annually on the BJCC, but that will jump 76 percent to $8.8 million annually. The $264 million — more than $1 million for every resident — is just the first step: County and state commitments are still needed for the $624 million project to survive. Couldn’t we just dump truckloads of money down the sewer, instead?
• Vote sets 30-year pay plan for BJCC
[Birmingham News]

In odd we trust: God, supreme ruler of the universe, has disassociated himself from fired CEO and Healthsouth founder Richard Scrushy. In a statement issued Thursday, God commended Scrushy for his “renewed dedication to Christian teachings” and his plans to feed African children, but stated that “I have nothing to do with Scrushy’s missionary work or ongoing legal battles. And his invocation of my name borders on copyright infringement.”
• Scrushy: Ministry to feed African children, offer mortgages [Associated Press]

Earth weekend: As you’re cleaning out your trash, a friendly reminder that many Earth Day events take place this weekend.

• A roundup of events, including Saturday tree plantings at Shades Creek.
• TechBirmingham will take your gadgets for reuse or proper disposal Saturday at 12 locations.
• You can’t spell Earth Day without “e-a-t” (well, we can’t spell anyway …), so be sure to stop by the Eighth Annual Lebanese Food & Cultural Festival at St. Elias Maronite Catholic Church on Southside today and Saturday. (warning: audio plays automatically)

Also:

• Bird flu expected to take years to catch on in local market
• Easter “sugar high” finally wearing off
• Have we mentioned our giant new speedboat lately?

• • •

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Scientific Americans: President Bush dropped by Tuskegee University Wednesday to announce a new push to fund scientific research to remain globally competitive. The plan calls for $136 billion over 10 years to train teachers and provide Pell Grants for students planning to major in math or science. It’s called the American Competitiveness Initiative, but we prefer “No Nerd Left Behind.”

• Handpicked student audience didn’t vote for Bush, “indifferent,” “excited”
• The speech video (Windows Media) | transcript
• Photo essay
• Moore: Bush visit part of vast right-wing conspiracy to undermine gubernatorial bid

• Bush pushes research in Tuskegee [Montgomery Advertiser]

L.A. laws: Gov. Riley is counting up his legislative wins as he rolls toward the June primaries. Among the achievements: tax breaks for the poor, expanded use of children’s car seats, a February presidential primary and criminalizing the injury or murder of a fetus (not counting abortion). April 28 is the signing deadline on the bills.
• Riley says he ‘couldn’t be happier’ as session ends [Birmingham News]

Down the drain: The jury was expected to begin deliberations today in the sewer trial involving former Jefferson County commissioner Chris McNair and various contractors. The charges: bribery and conspiracy. The question: Did McNair receive bribes or gifts in the form of thousands of dollars in cash envelopes? This is the first of two trials for McNair, whose own daughter testified against him. The sewer fiasco started out at $1 billion and is now expected to cost $3 billion to fix. Additional coverage.
• First sewer swindle trial closes [Birmingham Weekly]

Also:

• Killer storms threaten porous citizens
• Parents expected to ruin kids’ lives through over-, underparenting
• Spring fever upgraded to vernal plague

• • •

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Detente, y’all: It’s about time. Birmingham Mayor Bernard Kincaid and Alabama Governor Bob Riley met in private for the first time ever last week. Among the topics were BJCC expansion and mass transit. And it took only three years. As we’ve said, cooperation is the watchword.
• Mayor gets governor’s ear [Birmingham News]

Fire up a bowl?: Our pal Ray Melick reports that Birmingham may get a third-tier bowl game by year’s end, thanks to ESPN Regional TV. The proposed matchup would pit Conference USA vs. either the Big East or the Mid-America conferences. Ray mentions in his column that ESPN has put up a $2 million line of credit, making it nearly a nothing-to-lose proposition for the city. Anyone up for the Fighting Mules of Central Missouri State against the Golden Hurricanes of Tulsa? Rah.
• Birmingham may get new bowl game [Birmingham News]

Won’t you come home, Brown Bomber?: Joe Louis is a boxing legend everywhere, except his birthplace, Lafayette. Hometown residents would like to put up a statue in his honor, but have raised less than one-fifth of the $50,000 cost. Among previous tributes is Joe Louis Arena in Detroit (where he lived starting at age 10) and a wreath-laying ceremony at his grave site in Arlington last week (marking the 25th anniversary of his death).
• Joe Louis’ Alabama hometown trying to reconnect [Associated Press]

Victory is life: Congratulations to the Birmingham News, a finalist in editorial writing for this year’s Pulitzer Prizes for its “series of incisive editorials reversing the paper’s long-held support of the death penalty.” The editorial board won the Pulitzer in 1991 for its series on inequities in the state tax system.
• Pulitzer Prizes for Journalism

Also:

• Disgraced CEO finds God, shakes Him down for cash
• Still looking for Easter eggs in porn DVD
• Downtown accountants enter hibernation until Dec. 31

• • •

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As ye sew, so shall ye reap: “The Stitchers” at Anniston’s First United Methodist Church prefer to work anonymously on the 10 hand-sewn purple Lenten banners. Their work will be up by Easter and will hang until May 23. One Stitcher said, “Oh, there might be a few spots of blood on one or two these, but only we’ll know it’s there, and we’re not tellin’ a soul.” The idea for the homemade banners came from a church leader, who saw similar banners at Trinity United Methodist Church in Homewood in 2003. Happy (early) Easter!
• Stitchers’ Lenten banners adorn Anniston church [Anniston Star]

1040, ver. 2.0: More Alabamians than ever are filing their taxes electronically. The Internal Revenue Service estimates that 1.23 million state residents will file via Internet, a 4.4 percent jump from 2005. Wait, taxes? We paid last year. (A classic.)
• IRS: Alabamians using electronic filing in record numbers [Associated Press]

Booster busted head: Logan Young’s death has been ruled accidental. Memphis police say the Alabama booster hit his head on a railing while walking up stairs, remained on the floor, then walked through several rooms, bleeding all the while. Initially, police believed his death to be a homicide.
• Bama booster hit head, died accidentally, police say [Associated Press]

Pomp and circumstances: The Associated Press is reporting President Bush will be back in Alabama on Wednesday for commencement ceremonies at Tuskegee University. But the school’s event calendar shows graduation isn’t scheduled until May 14. Dubya will do anything for a “learnin’ gown.”
• Bush to visit Tuskegee Univ. next week [Associated Press]

Also:

• E. coli traced to eggs left by Easter Bunny
• Mayor, governor confer on secret backup dome
• Will Smith to star in 2007 comedy-action pic, “Letter from Birmingham Jail”

• • •

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Death Race 2006: For Alabama roads, it’s Saturday, bloody Saturday. While more auto accidents happen on Fridays, more fatalities occur on Saturdays. Chalk it up to those damn kids and alcohol. Friday’s high number of wrecks could be because it’s a travel day, or because, as studies have shown, fatigue is highest by week’s end. In the past decade, wrecks are up but fatalities are down, thanks to safer vehicles. God bless the Hummer.
• Deadliest day on roads is Saturday [Birmingham News]

The Vast Latino-Wing Conspiracy: How did all those thousands of protestors organize and march in hundreds of cities in only a matter of days? Communication. Networking. Outrage. Cumberland law student Sigfredo Rubio said, “About two weeks ago, we called a meeting in which we included the radio stations, members of the Catholic Church, the newspapers, the directors of the soccer leagues. (With) the first meeting of 15 people, we had a connection with a couple of thousand, just through those groups. It just grew.” Wait till we get the Koreans fired up …
• Strategy Sessions Fueled Immigrant Marches [New York Times]

Ebony on ivory: Birmingham’s Condi Rice: stateswoman, politician, classical pianist. The Secretary of State performed with the Denver Symphony Orchestra — at age 15. Now, she plays with professionals at her Watergate condo on weekends. We’d like to make sweet music with her any day.

• Rice remembers Mama for Good Housekeeping Mother’s Day tribute

• Condoleezza Rice on Piano [New York Times]

Also:

• Minor leaguers need seasoning in steroid abuse
• Hurricanes predicted to beat up state, vow to never do it again
• What you missed while ‘Idol’ was on

• • •

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Foul play for Logan Young?: Tide superfan and convicted racketeer Logan Young was found dead today in his Memphis home. Police suspect foul play. Young was convicted in June of racketeering and bribery, and his appeal was pending. His testimony helped bring NCAA sanctions against the University of Alabama.
• Logan Young found dead, apparently attacked [Tuscaloosa News]

Half-billion boost: In time for Wednesday’s 175th anniversary celebration, the University of Alabama has kicked off a $500 million endowment campaign. The money will go to scholarships, faculty salaries, libraries and construction, including expanding Bryany-Denny Stadium and renovating Coleman Coliseum. The university has already raised $299 million. OK, but where’s our free tote bag and football phone?

• Athletics department shakeup aimed at … raising money
• Tide boasts champion at … Rock Paper Scissors(!)

• UA announces $500 million endowment drive [Tuscaloosa News]

Million-dollar baby: We’re happy for Fayette native Mike Davis, really. The new UAB men’s basketball coach (formerly head coach at Indiana) will pull down $5 million for five years. Wow. Hope they won’t have to raise tuition or cut corners on campus construction.

• UAB medical schools raise tuition
• Trustees concerned about UAB biohazard lab construction costs, safety

• Incentive-laden deal could push $1 million [Birmingham News]

Also:

• School changes motto to “Chug! Chug! Chug!”
• Pledges conduct virtual panty raid on Facebook.com, MySpace
• Lacrosse team loses heartbreaking season ender in court, 12-0

• • •

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Alien nation: Thousands of protestors marched through downtown Birmingham Sunday to call for immigration reform. On the wish list: visas, border security, worker protection and a chance at citizenship. The report mentioned 3,000 marchers, while other reports pegged it as high as 4,000 or 5,000. Another 5,000 marched today in Albertville. Thousands of protestors marched this weekend in more than 100 cities across the United States.

Fortunately, a solution is at hand. The Alabama Federation of Republican Women wants to deny automatic U.S. citizenship to babies with undocumented parents, a right guaranteed under the 14th Amendment. Hey, wouldn’t that create more illegal aliens?
• 3,000 march downtown for immigration reform [Birmingham News]

We’ll take center square to win: Many shopping centers and condos have taken root in the Birmingham area, but perhaps none have been as splashy as SoHo Square, the residential-retail complex that ate Homewood. On its heels is another condo complex. Some residents and shop owners are concerned that the economic development is without direction or limits. Well, it was either Homewood or Hobotown, and Hobotown smells funny.
• An Outburst of Development in a Small City in Alabama [New York Times]

How about SoSo?: Terrace Court won’t live to see 100. The Five Points South apartment building, home to Dave’s Pub and Bailey’s Pub, will be demolished this summer to build … condos. Dave’s is staying, but Bailey’s is toast. But then, where will one of our favorite bands play?
• Five Points landmark [Birmingham Business Journal]

Also:

• Accountants’ pencil supplies running dangerously low
• Cell reception could be clearer, stronger
• We still haven’t found all of last year’s Easter eggs

• • •

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The first step: Kudos to Rep. John Knight, who after years of work and overcoming the Legislature’s indifference and the education lobby’s resistance, succeeded with a tax cut for the poor in Alabama. The state was ranked first in taxing the poor before, and while the bill (expected to be signed into law soon) provides modest relief for families, it’s a start. The new rank: No. 4. Maybe we can stop taxing food at some point, for fun.
• Alabama lowering income taxes on working poor [Associated Press]

Met effect: Kudos to Art Clarkson, the legendary sports owner and promoter. He talked a Birmingham suburb into spending $12 million to build the Hoover Metropolitan Stadium for minor league baseball. It opened in 1988. Nowadays, it generates $10 million in spending for the annual SEC baseball tournament and will net another $5 million for a nationally televised four-day beach volleyball tourney in July — on top of plain ol’ Barons baseball, which kicks off tonight. Surprisingly, it doesn’t pay for itself with the city, but makes up for a lot of it in tax revenues. The Barons schedule all events there, and the general manager said, “This is the most used and versatile sports venue in Birmingham.” Pretty good for no dome.
• Met all set for 19th opener [Birmingham News]

Money me’s: Students at Minor, Shades Valley and Hoover high schools have the chance to become budding capitalists. Close to 200 have enrolled in the Academy of Finance, a slate of courses teaching finance, business, banking, economics and more. The courses are tied to the New York-based National Academy Foundation. About 30 percent of the academy’s “graduates” go into a career in finance. We know plenty of adults who need to be enrolled yesterday.
• Show 'em the money — youths learn its use [Birmingham News]

Also:

• Ice cream trucks prepare to deliver frozen treats, narcotics
• Hitchhiker aspires to be professional HOV passenger
• Allergens roam city unchecked, unlicensed

• • •

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Money? Well … spent: The Jefferson County Commission has paid more than $200,000 in PR services. Don’t worry: Your tax dollars aren’t being squandered. First, they sent out this neat brochure that explains how the commission has saved you money. Second, the PR firms billed for vital services like reading the newspaper, putting stickers on folders, attending meetings and attending more meetings. We’re just bitter because we provide all those services for double the cost — that’s the Wade on Birmingham difference.
• County spends $202,000 for PR [Birmingham News]

Maximizing security: As required by the federal Prison Rape Elimination Act, Alabama is taking steps to curb sexual assault in prisons. Step No. 1: Posters! Egad, will it be the kitty in the tree captioned “Hang in there, baby!” or the sleek management poster touting “F R E E D O M.”
• Prison system takes steps to crack down on inmate sexual violence [Associated Press]

39 cents and a dream: If you didn’t actually receive your county commission flyer, maybe it’s because the post office hasn’t picked it up yet. The Postal Service moved its collection times to earlier in the day around the city — some before noon. That has made it difficult for some businesses to get outgoing letters and packages ready on time. Kristy White said the downtown branch has drive-through boxes with last collection times at 8 p.m. That’s simply not true: They stopped collecting that late at those outdoor boxes long ago — you must go inside and drop off before 8. But heck, 39 cents is still a bargain, right? Right?
• Mail collection time change vexes some [Birmingham News]

Also:

• Baby sells naming rights to online casino
• Overpriced bottle cap murals planned for art festival
• Tonight, a very special episode of takeout food and overtime

• • •

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