Heads and tales: A study in contradictions

Suck it: The Alabama House says it’s OK for women to expose themselves to children, some no older a few months. Before you yell at your rep (you do know who your rep is, right?), it’s merely a bill to allow public breastfeeding. At least one level-headed representive, DuWayne Bridges, has thought of the children: “I think it would be good for (breastfeeding moms) to go to their automobile or to the restroom.” Meanwhile, a Huntsville strip club’s owner and manager have been indicted because women exposed themselves to children, some no older then 55 or 60 years old. Let’s just outlaw boobs and get it over with.
• House passes bill to allow breast feeding in public [Associated Press]

A ruse by any other name: American forces moved into the suburban stronghold of Vestavia Hills Wednesday, ending the long tyranical regime that had gripped this troubled village. Soldiers and civilians alike ripped down the name of the dictator Richard M. Scrushy from its library, dragging the signs through the streets. Residents greeted the soldiers as liberators, shouting “Y’all done good bagging Dick! (‘You have performed admirably freeing us from Richard’s stranglehold.’)” Meanwhile, Scrushy remains at large trying to recruit followers to his cult.
• Board votes Scrushy off name, sign [Birmingham News]

Money to burn: Alabamians filed a record 47,844 bankruptcies in 2005, in part to avoid tighter restrictions under a new federal bankruptcy law. “It is ironic that, at least in the short term, a law Congress hoped would reduce bankruptcies instead caused the largest upward spike in history,” said Samuel J. Gerdano, executive director of the American Bankruptcy Institute. Let’s just outlaw poverty and get it over with.
• Alabama cases hit record high level in '05 [Birmingham News]

Also:

• State prepares for hurricane season by stockpiling bread, milk, Jesus videos
• Transportation department plans to sell “Traffic Cam Topless Hotties”
• Bored journalists read forbidden blogs for sSePcErLeLt mCeHsEsCaKgNeOsW

• • •

Send us your news tips.

Posted: Thursday, March 30, 2006, 12:24 pm, in Headlines.
For this entry: E-mail | comments feed | trackback.