Wade’s 101: Haiku retrospective 75
Friday, July 10th, 2026[Share on Twitter/X | Facebook]
- a cry in the night
He would toss himself
awake in the wee hours when
having a nightmare. - ship of theseus
Plank by plank, nail by
nail materializes
a new (and old) boat. - the invasion of private equity
1. Buy company.
2. Squeeze out all the money.
3. Discard at will. - fickle memories
What you remember
and what I remember are
two different things. - forever frugal
There’s cheap, and then there’s
“never-buy-anything-new-
and-stick-with-it” cheap. - the korean mcdonald’s
Where the neighborhood
gathers for cheap coffee and
assorted gossip. - walking the subdivision
Exploring the nooks
and crannies by day via
the sidewalk express. - in the waiting room
Cramped quarters, wrinkled
magazines, dispenser for
coffee, live patients. - degrees of living
Trapped at home or out
and about. Exercising
or sitting for days. - time for a protest
Meet me at the park.
Bring your best signs and chants. See
solidarity. - subscribe to my new podcast
My buddy and I
rap about life and stuff, not
like those other guys. - meals on wheels
Keeping seniors fed
with volunteers making and
delivering meals. - the uninvited tree
It crashed through the roof,
making holes for the rain and
scaring the kitties. - staying with the parents
Familiar setting
where she can sort of relax
and sort of go out. - main character energy
All bow before the
one true protagonist, then
get out of the way. - when to go to hr
Never. Just never.
HR is there to protect
the corporation. - sex fishbowl
A container that’s
swimming with good ideas
about games to play. - left turn on red
No one is coming.
The signal isn’t changing.
Hustle through and pray. - warm touches
Marketing around
every corner of the Web
to capture your cash. - meal prep
She chops the veggies.
He gets the pots and pans. They
dance around the stove. - the throuple blues
The towels are marked
hers and hers and his but they’re
never used that way. - the epstein files
Any day now, we’ll
find out who exploited whom
for fun and profit. - the untreated water
Fluoridation is
now considered a poisoned
luxury item. - aging in place
The elderly have
the opportunity to
stay at home for good. - back to the park
New trails to hike and
lotsa opportunities
to nurture nature. - tornado season
Purchase a weather
radio, find a good place
to hide, wait for it … - tv by mail
He sent a flat screen
to his buddy just for kicks,
a super present. - live fierce
Don’t let anyone
dictate how to live or who
to love. It’s your life. - the fastest
Swift as the wind, she
rode past her competitors
to the finish line. - separate messaging
Dumbed-down version for
the crowd, targeted language
for the elite few. - the spying tv
It watches what I
watch, learning my preferences
and serving up ads. - latin all around
Bona fide, carpe
diem, pro bono, quid pro
quo, ad nauseam. - i need the exercise
Laziness is fun,
but it’s no substitute for
a healthy workout. - solar revenge
Sunburned arms shed their
damaged skin, turning from red
to a deeper brown. - invasion of the data centers
Large warehouses of
computer equipment that
eat power, water. - back on the treadmill
One step in front of
another until 3 miles
are under my belt. - the 4-hour deposition
The lawyers bickered
over questions while charging
exorbitant rates. - more workouts, more fuel
More calories, more
energy, more distance, more
speed, more victories. - dead mother’s day brunch
They remembered their
moms over eggs Benedict,
avocado toast. - a post-ai world
No work, no purpose,
just an empty existence
among the masses. - data is the new oil
Geysers of data
flow from smartwatches and phones
and hot-wired houses. - a night at the opera
Powerful voices
onstage convey beauty and
despair and longing. - spring in full bloom
Fragrant flowers fill
the air with a lovely scent
while butterflies float. - inertia is not my friend
Falling behind in
everything, unable to
make up momentum. - off to albuquerque
Hopping an early
morning flight to the desert
to see some old friends. - graduation 2026
Your hard-earned degrees
are worthless. No escape from
AI destruction. - the ticket seller
She wants to sell more
passes, but doesn’t know how
to set the prices. - the block party
Neighbors gather to
meet up and eat up. Kids and
pets also welcome. - red state blues
The past has never
left us. We vote for no change
again and again. - god bless the teachers
They educate the
children for low pay despite
grief from their parents. - his personal palette
He’s an autumn, so
his colors are olive green,
brick red and mustard. - venmo me
Gimme my cash now.
Zap it to me from your phone
to my bank account. - foreign tornadoes
You never hear news
about foreign tornadoes.
Why not? They exist. - a commitment to doing wrong
It takes a lot of
time and energy to pull
off this much evil. - they’ll just make more wars
Peace in our lifetime?
Ha! Not when we have tanks and
missiles to deploy. - the finicky fridge
The motor grinds in
grand fashion as the inside
has a small heat stroke. - no more home repairs
Can’t afford any
more broken appliances
or burnt-out breakers. - tandem hike
Deep in the forest,
a pair squared off against the
lush green mountain trail. - home school superlatives
Most Likely to Take
Mom to Homecoming, Best Legs
for Plowing, Class Frown. - to be seen and heard
We are voices in
the wilderness hoping to
find an audience. - beauty at all costs
A facelift, a shot
or two of botox, a chance
to lose some wrinkles. - the lonely soul at lunch
He doesn’t join in
company parties or those
social niceties. - a romantic gesture
She sent me her words
in a letter that spelled out
what I mean to her. - the nicest town in america
It stands out for its
hospitality and its
20 Chick-fil-As. - burner phone
A regular phone,
and also one to send top
secret messages. - dismissed with a glance
His face said it with
absolute seriousness,
no fucking around. - failing upwards 2026
Those who can, do. Those
who can’t, end up in cushy
government careers. - the secret ingredient is praise
Take the time to catch
people doing something right.
Win their hearts and minds. - did i pack everything?
Socks, underwear, shirts,
toothbrush, pajamas, shampoo,
phone charger, sunscreen. - it’s in the eyes
The actress conveys
true emotion with a glance,
a look that screams fear. - we like to be scared
Going to haunted
houses, watching slasher films,
reading a thriller. - soccer fever
Fans root for countries
in global phenomenon
about kicking balls. - hitting my stride
The words seem to flow
freely with growing practice
and experience. - to volunteer in new orleans
After Katrina,
a chance to rebuild and help
our southern neighbors. - ultimate fighting
Our new national
sport: Fight fiercely by any
means necessary. - an ozempic world
Take a shot once a
week and lose those stubborn pounds
in rapid fashion. - the power of reruns
Most television
is a series of reruns
to recapture eyes. - the worst job market ever
Many fake listings,
many AI résumés,
no one is hiring. - the dumbest motherfuckers
Not notably bright,
but able to loot the world
in outrageous ways. - tiktok attention span
How do we share these
complex concepts when no one
can pay attention? - can we support local businesses?
These are challenging
times when inflation is high
and cash is so tight. - don’t believe everything you think
We subject ourselves
to a barrage of toxic
judgments and beliefs. - relapsing
The temptations are
too strong, as the addiction
reasserts control. - prediction markets
Inflation is dead.
Iran will surrender. Gold
crashes. Wanna bet? - the fate of journalism
Let the oligarchs
control the headlines, so the
public knows nothing. - the mattress to end all mattresses
Firm yet soft, cozy
yet roomy, odor-free yet
pleasantly scented. - we are connected by grief
“I love the thing that
I most wish had not happened,”
Stephen Colbert said. - electra and vulcan, a love story
A Greek princess and
Roman god stand watch over
a magical town. - what to do with these peppers
Enhancing meals with
spicy kick, resulting in
severe hot flashes. - earworms
They’re so darn catchy
that they stick in your brain like
audio taffy. - requiem for 60 minutes
For 60 years, a
top newsmagazine that told
important stories. - plunging tourism
They’re afraid to come
because they might be detained,
rejected or shot. - she gets twitchy
The music starts, and
the beat enthralls her attuned
body. Let’s dance now. - the fall of the american empire
The corruption runs
rampant. New wars bloom monthly.
A land in decline. - 250
Let’s celebrate our
semiquincentennial
with a birthday cake. - welcome to the world cup
North America
invites you to take in a
rowdy soccer match. - the vegan lifestyle
Checking carefully
the list of ingredients
for critter input. - re-networking
Getting back out there
to meet professionals and
learn about their work. - the perils of motherhood
Moms understand that
they can do it all, and still
their children depart. - a lesson in scuba diving
They are learning the
basics: breathing, ear pressure
and clearing the mask. - girls in boy scouts
Same merit badges,
same campouts, same spirit. Sep-
arate, but equal.
• • •
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