The problem with a
budget is window shopping
becomes obsession.

• • •

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A great costume sparks
envy and awe among those
stuck in basse couture.

• • •

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Election Day in America is almost upon us.

• If you’re not registered to vote, you have until Monday at 5 p.m. Register online with the State of Alabama. Register in person at:

• local boards of registrars,
• state and county offices that provide public assistance,
• driver’s license renewal offices,
• county library branches
• and some city library branches.

Call the Secretary of State at 800-274-8683 for additional information.

• We have the sample ballots for Jefferson and Shelby Counties for the primaries. (The Jefferson County ballot has 350 versions, one for every sub-district.)

Find your polling place/districts.

The ballot has federal, state and county offices, along with four state amendments. The back page for all county ballots — detailing those amendments — is the same and included below. And check out the Alabama Voter Guide 2018, with voting procedures and frequently asked questions.

For easier viewing, you can print, download or zoom to full screen with each ballot.

Election Day is Nov. 6.

• • •

Sample ballots for all 67 counties.

• • •

Jefferson County

[Mobile version]

• • •

Shelby County

[Mobile version]

• • •

All counties: back page

[Mobile version]

• • •

Alabama Voter Guide 2018

[Mobile version]

• • •

More Vote 2018 coverage.

All awards are trite
and egoistic except
for the ones I win.

• • •

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Front yards aglow with
inflatable ghosts and troupes
of dancing pumpkins.

• • •

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Young people don’t vote.
Old people do. And make bad
picks. Old people win.

• • •

Read more haiku.

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Just how long should a
password be when companies
get hacked anyway?

• • •

Read more haiku.

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A look at Birmingham in videos …

Promo for the Woolworth bar in Five Points South. From Focus Creative.

•

Fire engulfs Metropolitan apartments under construction in September in Lakeview. From Frank Mullens.

More fire footage. From al.com.

Drone footage of the fire. From WVTM-13 News.

•

CBS-42 report on driver allegedly holding students on Birmingham city school bus in September in Oxmoor Valley. From CBS 42.

•

Sixteenth Street Baptist Church competes for a $150,000 Partners in Preservation grant. From Alabama NewsCenter.

•

Promo for the Festival of Life religious conference on Oct. 24 at Boutwell Auditorium downtown. From RCCG Jesus House Huntsville.

•

A visitor picks his 12 favorite spots in Birmingham, including the Birmingham Botanical Gardens, Railroad Park, Birmingham Museum of Art and Barber Vintage Motorsports Museum. From Jeremy Bowling.

•

Snippets from the Workforce Summit and UI Directors’ Conference from the National Association of State Workforce Agencies in September at the BJCC East Meeting Rooms downtown. From InfoTech Videos.

•

Commercial for new Alliance of American Football franchise the Birmingham Iron. From Alliance of American Football.

•

Promo for the Club private supper club. From the Club.

•

Feature on not-for-profit Southern Research’s fund-raising campaign for work in neurosciences. From Alabama NewsCenter.

•

Promo for the Birmingham Water Works. From Birmingham Water Works Vids.

•

U.S. Chamber of Commerce names Glen Iris app developer MotionMobs as finalist in the Dream Big Small Business of the Year Award. From Alabama NewsCenter.

•

Birmingham mayor Randall Woodfin proposes in September buying new uniforms for the seven city high school marching bands (our vertical video of the week). From Mayor Randall Woodfin.

•

South Carolina Christian rock band Needtobreathe performs “No Excuses” in 2017 at the Lyric Theatre downtown. From Max Haben.

•

Checking out rides. From Bassballinchevy334.

•

Rapper/singer-songwriter J. Cole performs in September at Legacy Arena downtown (our other vertical video of the week). From Apex Consulting Solutions.

•

Greenville, S.C., blues-rock group Marcus King Band performs in September at Zydeco on Southside. From Mark Berry.

•

Mounds, Okla.-based GoBob Pipe and Steel Sales announces a new Birmingham distribution center. From GoBob Pipe and Steel Sales.

•

An arrest outside of the UAB Hill Student Center (our other other vertical video of the week). From Ivelisse Sanchez.

•

Raining in the parking lot. From Mista Rich.

•

Commercial for post-Magic City Classic concert on Oct. 26 at Boutwell Auditorium downtown, including Maze and the Manhattans. From Jerry Mason.

•

Testimonial for Eng1ine Fitness in Brook Highland. From Chris Kizziah.

•

Destin jam band Cadillac Willy and Montgomery funk-blues band Blues Old Stand perform “Red Hot Mama” in 2015 at Avondale Brewing Company. From Morgan Lemly.

•

Michael Weber of Entrepreneurs’ Organization Birmingham announces fall events. From EO Birmingham.

•

Members of Positively Funny Improv perform “Action Slips” in 2012 at the Rare Martini in Lakeview. From Positively Funny Improv.

Members of Positively Funny Improv perform “First Date” in 2015 at the Wynfrey Hotel in Hoover. From Positively Funny Improv.

•

Promo for Yaxeni y Ricardo los Luzeros de Rioverde performing at Fiesta in September at Linn Park downtown. From Yaxeni y Ricardo los Luzeros de Rioverde.

And onstage. From Yaxeni y Ricardo los Luzeros de Rioverde.

•

Family fun at the Birmingham Botanical Gardens (our final vertical video of the week). From Knit Fitness LLC.

• • •

Send us links to your videos. | More videos on the Birmingham channel.

The best jazz comes from
Montana, where the beats drop
all around the clock.

• • •

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Photo: Herbert Frank (CC)

My picks for #sundayread for October 14, 2018:

• Wade’s 101: #Haiku retrospective 47
  #poetry
• Information terrorists have weaponized social media, blogs, videos and other digital channels
  By @MollyMcKew
• SMASH THE 1 PERCENT!!!
  By @DavidBarstow, @SusanneCraig and @RussBuettner
• Flashback: What’s the next big social media network?
• King Tut Was Disabled, Malarial and Inbred
  By @KerThan
  (RT @LiekeMuller)
• A Loaded Gun: Amy Bishop and the 2010 mass shooting at the University of Alabama in Huntsville
  By @PRaddenKeefe
• Flashback: From 2013, marking Wade on Birmingham’s eighth anniversary
• Smart contracts for the music industry
  By @ImogenHeap
• What Makes @NBCTheGoodPlace So Good?
  By Sam Anderson @shamblanderson
• Flashback: Comfortable language
• The Year the Networks Finally Embraced Diversity
  By @KateAurthur
• China Used a Tiny Chip in a Hack That Infiltrated U.S. Companies
  By Jordan Robertson @jordanr1000 and @MichaelRileyDC
  (via @ShiraOvide @thomaspower)
• Diary of a Do-Gooder: The anonymous tasks of everyday activism
  By @SaraEckel
  (via @saribotton)
• Pa’s Punny Punchline: The Dad Jokes Phenomenon
  By @AshleyFetters

More posts from Wade this week:

• The Birmingham channel: Sharp objects

More #sundayread:

• All tweets for October 14 #sundayread
• The latest #sundayread tweets
• More #sundayread recommendations from me

Where once all (white) men
were created equal, now
they’re the master race.

• • •

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The voice inside my
head shouts at me (and others):
“Fight, goddammit, fight!”

• • •

Read more haiku.

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[Share on Twitter]

1. the south shall fall again
   Why start a second
   civil war when we never
   finished the first one?
2. sun strokes
   It is too hot to
   work, to hike, to drive, to sleep,
   to dine, to endure.
3. less fun phone games
   How long will 7
   percent battery last? How
   bad is the screen cracked?
4. gusts of nothing
   They may huff and puff
   and blow your house down, but they
   still can’t get to you.
5. they plot, fear not
   Homophones and a
   gang of unslanted rhymes hatched
   their grand rhyming scheme.
6. nature’s disown
   The drowning frog does
   not ask why, but curses the
   scorpion to death.
7. bands and brands
   Jefferson Airplane,
   Jefferson Starship, Starship,
   and next version, Tar.
8. peanut gallery 2.0
   Wander into the
   comments online and find the
   worst, best among us.
9. blessed are the pedestrians
   The savior is on
   his way, requests you park in
   designated lots.
10. another word for
    When the poem runs
    just one syllable too long:
    Thank you, thesaurus.
11. the problem auteur
    Singular vision
    coupled with outdated views
    on equality.
12. hyporationality
    Logic and reason
    aren’t the right weapons in a
    modern tête-à-tête.
13. festival foe
    Lightning struck without
    hitting anything, sending
    fans to seek shelter.
14. my drone army
    My drone army brings
    pizza, spies on neighbors, fights
    sparrows, drops flyers.
15. the empty conveyances
    Buses run a few
    routes, an hour behind and
    sometimes broken down.
16. the current
    Sedated patient
    receives small jolt to shock her
    out of depression.
17. paparazzi safari
    Always shoot giraffes
    in portrait mode because it
    makes them look slimmer.
18. bless your countings
    Humility can
    be one of the greatest traits
    hidden inside us.
19. blinded by the humidity
    Escaping the ice
    cold interior to a
    foggy glasses world.
20. partial to cloudy
    I’ve fallen in love
    with the sky and her wondrous
    ever-changing moods.
21. how much flair for a mcbot
    The kiosk never
    said hi or made eye contact,
    just took meal orders.
22. gustatory grid
    He took his dining
    seriously, charting strengths,
    specialties and price.
23. the acquisition
    A have not having
    is a blessing in the form
    of pure gratitude.
24. too many apples, too many days
    Take vitamins A
    through Z with a dose of in-
    essential oil.
25. murphy’s tribe
    The baseball legend
    reveled in his family,
    always at home plate.
26. as seen onscreen
    Documentaries
    revel in small details that
    happen to be true.
27. off to never never land
    Nightmare fuel is made
    of spiders, shadows and loud
    noises from nowhere.
28. renal field trip
    She gave away a
    spare kidney to save a sick
    stranger from demise.
29. and ice cream and curtains
    Sometimes, summer is
    about hiding inside with
    AC and cold drank.
30. infinitesimal progress
    The very first step
    is always the hardest and
    often not taken.
31. shortcomings of a scribe
    The writer looks on
    with disdain, not at others’
    success, but his flops.
32. chokesperson
    Meeting the press turned
    into a PR nightmare
    with no way to flee.
33. the untidy wind
    A gentle breeze came
    by to shuffle my papers
    without permission.
34. bury me with the following books …
    It’s less of a neat
    reading list at this point and
    more like a burden.
35. pep alley
    We should line the streets
    and mercilessly taunt kids
    going back to school.
36. a shovelful of sugar
    A stubborn psyche
    can be conquered with sweets as
    outright bribery.
37. meanwhile out west
    A fire the size
    of a city razes the
    green world it touches.
38. barley containable
    The only thing we
    have to fear is gluten and
    gluten foods … itself.
39. fifty years in a blink
    The real surprise for
    the birthday boy was that he
    lived to that milestone.
40. the magic porch
    Pens, notebooks and wine
    fuel all-night songwriting on
    real love and heartbreak.
41. and salad for dessert
    Some potatoes, some
    meat, a few glasses of wine.
    bites of cheese and bread.
42. the plastic sea
    We weave a giant
    tapestry of discarded
    bottles and torn bits.
43. sad songs in major keys
    Spitting out words to
    an upbeat melody with
    a pasted-on smile.
44. spite club
    When two assholes fight,
    do we want one to win or
    both to brawl to death?
45. mother aretha
    The Queen of Soul calls
    us home with her transcendent
    voice and bold spirit.
46. popsicle race
    To drink the frozen
    fruity slab before the sun
    demolishes it.
47. the first first day of school
    Eyes bright with wonder,
    backpack along for the ride,
    the journey begins.
48. the last first day of school
    Hesitation as
    she hits the hallways of her
    youth for one last time.
49. before another trip around the sun
    Her special day runs
    from breakfast in bed to a
    night out on the town.
50. the broke barometer
    The romance of deep
    poverty sours before
    the gallon of milk.
51. salty and delicious
    ? When the tears from their
    eyes causes lots of sighs, that’s
    white fragility … ?
52. unscheduled bacteria
    But really, when is
    a good time to get sick? Take
    two breaths and rest up.
53. the interviewer’s credo
    Carefully watch and
    listen. Pause to draw them out.
    Ask strong follow-ups.
54. an uncivil age
    What is etiquette
    when we take private moments
    and share them online?
55. what passes for a society page these days
    The only point of
    a new restaurant is to
    be seen at its launch.
56. several americas
    Many sides to an
    issue, mostly wrong, but voiced
    with indignation.
57. dumb dump
    A contagion of
    stupid infects through toes and
    slides up to the brain.
58. this just isn’t in
    The headlines blare all
    day long in a nonstop flood
    of true awfulness.
59. dance the day away
    Huckster hops around
    with spinning sign and shouts of
    chipper enticement.
60. to new moms
    Before you know it,
    he’ll zip into all kinds of
    unsanctioned mischief.
61. demolish the character building
    If I could do it
    all over again, I’d
    skip the lousy parts.
62. trickle-up economics
    We toil fiercely
    to line their coffers while we
    can’t afford coffins.
63. joystick jockeys
    The players wielded
    their controllers like daggers
    ready to slay forth.
64. newfound restraint
    Nothing more satis-
    fying than checking things off
    of your to-don’t list.
65. they serve at the displeasure of the president
    The loyalists staged
    a coup of sorts, less bloody
    and more financial.
66. provocation
    The artist creates.
    The public boos. The artist
    works. The public boos.
67. the new customer service
    Please hold, our bot will
    be with you in just a few
    moments to fail you.
68. the negligent wordsmith
    Can poetry be
    a collection of random
    words together? Tin.
69. the front-of-house clique
    They might get you a
    menu, or they might just stay
    in their knot of cool.
70. we once were allies
    They stood by us on
    our darkest day. We dropped them
    to embrace evil.
71. an outbreak of hurricanes
    Two to the east, one
    to the south, another to
    the west. Batten down.
72. a hurricane rhyme scheme
    All forces at once.
    A beautiful eerie calm.
    All forces again.
73. the wordsmith
    Putting care into
    each line, each syllable till
    each verse flows with ease.
74. the thousand-dollar soul stealer
    I need a smartphone
    with all the best features to
    take countless selfies.
75. the disappearing drug store
    Part-corporate drug
    dealer, part-vending machine,
    our lost five and dime.
76. the stoic’s guide to mourning
    My cat died and I
    ran over my right foot with
    my lawnmower. Ow.
77. the art of comedy
    Make ’em laugh, make ’em
    think. Or make ’em squirm. Or just
    make ’em pay up front.
78. ‘failed to comply’
    The cop came to the
    wrong apartment, gunned down the
    tenant, life goes on.
79. reading, writing, revenge
    She lined up the sight,
    breathed in, squeezed the trigger. The
    student/shooter … dead.
80. relatively amusing
    The summer has come
    and gone again like a fun,
    beloved uncle.
81. information diet
    I gorge on gossip
    and tabloids with no room left
    for current events.
82. the day the phone screen died
    How many years’ bad
    luck for smashing a little
    black mirror to bits?
83. all summer in a fall
    The autumn heat scorched
    schoolkids and pumpkin patches
    on a parched landscape.
84. aural retentive
    The books talk to me
    in a soft whisper, putting
    musings into words.
85. undiagnosed hyperopia
    Compassion is just
    looking out beyond one’s nose
    tip to some others.
86. early morning dim
    The hum of the lone
    Keurig promises a hot
    cuppa for one soul.
87. green public enemy no. 1
    Not big corporate
    polluters. Not fossil fuel
    cars. A drinking straw.
88. such spirit through the year
    Revelers care now:
    How many days till Christmas?
    Screw bats and Pilgrims.
89. the resting roman
    Fading white sheet with
    delicate string and even
    dowels all bunched up.
90. darkened hallways of commerce
    The last of the mall
    walkers rounded the corner
    where stores once sold junk.
91. worth its weight in data
    Snooping sites collect
    our lives bit by bit, all for
    the sake of commerce.
92. a bot ‘wrote’ this poem
    quickly, ferryboat
    recedes, coldhearted fleshy
    scrawny knives snoring
93. how to watch many shows during peak tv
    Picture in picture
    in picture in picture in
    picture in picture.
94. the game of monopoly
    Limiting choices
    and limiting freedom through
    consolidation.
95. how to spend football saturday
    The stores are empty.
    The streets are full of empty.
    The parks are empty.
96. hypochondriac’s progress
    A tickle in the
    throat becomes a cough, an ache,
    a fever, a death.
97. i wanna rock and roll all night and part of every day
    Even when we mis-
    hear lyrics, they still have a
    meaning so special.
98. tmi syndrome
    An occasional
    coughing fit, bleeding from
    the eyes, mild hunger.
99. ziff! bam! veto!
    “The West Wing” but in
    comic book form, soon to be
    a film and streamer.
100. the daily reminder
     To exercise. To
     pray. To look around. To be
     nicer. To hang on.
101. the end times
     We ran out of each
     and every flavor of ice
     cream except fat free.

• • •

Read more Wade’s 101.

Read more haiku.

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[Share on Twitter]

To exercise. To
pray. To look around. To be
nicer. To hang on.

• • •

Read more haiku.

Subscribe via RSS to Wade’s Daily Haiku. Or have it delivered daily by e-mail.

A look at Birmingham in videos …

An RV trip starts in Birmingham with Heavenly Donut Company, Railroad Park (plus food trucks) and Urban Cookhouse. From Bradley Bromlow.

•

Dashcam footage of driving from Pell City down I-20 west to Homewood. From D.W. Red.

•

Worship song at Church of the Highlands’ West Birmingham campus at Parker High School in Smithfield (our vertical video of the week). From Patiently Waiting.

•

Visiting the Mid-Autumn Festival (a k a the Moon Festival) in September at UAB Hill Student Center. From Tŏng Yé.

•

Birmingham punk band Bad Example performs in September at the Spring Street Firehouse in Avondale. From Colors of Nights.

•

Vlogging on the way out of town (our other vertical video of the week). From Bella Smith.

•

Touring a UAB dorm room (our other other vertical video of the week). From Tierra Turner.

•

Drum solo at Railroad Park downtown (our final vertical video of the week). From Queen Tall T AGB.

•

Drone footage of the Station Church in Bessemer. From C.W.

•

Renowned Chicago photographer Dawoud Bey discusses his 2013 work “The Birmingham Project.” From Elizabeth Laitman Hughes.

•

Birmingham civil rights leader C. Herbert Oliver on his 1963 report on the bombing of 16th Street Baptist Church. From the Gilder Lehrman Institute.

•

Promo for Mission Birmingham’s Pastors Prayer Summit in November in Talladega. From Kevin Moore.

•

Matthew Whitaker of GKHouses property management in Homewood on evicting tenants. From GKHouses.

•

A look at the newly opened Woolworth in Five Points South. From Alabama NewsCenter.

•

Marcus Vick for the Birmingham Thunderbolts against Memphis Maniax in a virtual XFL game. From Backbreaker D-League.

•

Fultondale’s 31 Escape adds ax throwing. From Kasey Strout.

•

Commercial for digital directory Near Birmingham. From Steve Taylor.

•

Promo for the UAB Collat School of Business. From UAB Collat School of Business.

•

Actress Reese Witherspoon appears in September at the Alabama Theatre downtown as part of her “Whiskey in a Teacup” book tour. From Living It Up with Laurel.

•

Highlight reel for Heritage Christian Academy senior pitcher/catcher Riley Akins at August’s Perfect Game Southeast Prospect Showcase in Atlanta. From Skill Show Videos.

•

A peek at Mercedes-Benz U.S. International’s annual Supplier Forum in June in Birmingham. From Cinepear.

•

Aaron Daniel and Jon Lunceford preview September 6A game Jackson-Olin at Carver. From WJOX 94.5.

•

Bernard Nomberg of the Nomberg Law Firm talks with Edward L. Hardin Jr. of Burr and Forman. From the Nomberg Law Firm.

•

Discussing 1963 and the civil rights movement, including “Letter from Birmingham Jail” and the bombing of the 16th Street Baptist Church. From Joseph Shelton Hall.

•

Walking through the shell of Century Plaza. From C-Dogg91.

•

Hot and Hot Fish Club’s Chris Hastings and Heartwood Forge’s Will Manning team up to make the Sportsman’s Knife Collection. From Tom Beckbe.

•

Promo for Chase Prep parochial school. From Common Thread.

•

Time-lapse footage of Birmingham artist Sonia J. Summers painting “Facets of Birmingham” as part of the Vulcans on Parade project, added in July. From Sonia J. Summers.

•

Autocar Family Fun Day in September at its Pinson Valley plant. From Russ Randolph.

• • •

Send us links to your videos. | More videos on the Birmingham channel.