Wade’s 101: Haiku retrospective 56
By Wade Kwon- banned words, 2020 edition
Pandemic, lockdown,
social distancing, face mask,
coronavirus. - the fights long since forgotten
An apology
sheepish and belated still
merits acceptance. - almost midnight
If you’ve read this far:
Congratulations, you sur-
vived 2020. - 2021 and bust
Never have we been
so grateful to see the dawn
of another year. - more and more winter
It is frostier,
outside and inside, spreading
shivers, slowing time. - easiest resolution ever
Join the gym and get
fit. Once pandemic ends and
it’s safe again. (wink!) - the need for work
It’s tough to make an
honest living when good jobs
can hardly be found. - american exceptionalism
Don’t worry: Other
countries have safety nets. The
U.S. has women. - revenge of mr. privilege
Don’t mess with me. I
can have you fired with the
slightest of complaints. - community won’t
A quaint notion, that
“common good,” the unfounded
trust in decency. - a friendship on pause
Uncomfortable
silence sprinkled with regrets
and mild annoyance. - the trust
By the time she found
out about it, most of the
money was long gone. - save the drama from your mama
Family intrigue
draws some closer together
to push others out. - anything for a buck store
Weed that flourishes
in the unkempt neighborhoods,
choking out the rest. - silent menace
The white walls steepen
overnight. No way out but
through. Dig and dig deep. - the undiscovered circuitry
A new gadget brings
the joy of figuring it
out, making it work. - lessons of 2020
How to beat COVID.
How to steal an election.
And Black Lives Matter. - acceptance? radical
Pain? Mandatory.
Suffering? Entirely
optional to you. - jab, jab, knockout
The first shot and a
little arm soreness. The next
shot: immunity. - the digital everlasting gobstopper
Browse for underwear.
See ads for underwear in
every site, page, dream. - the volunteer spirit
We give what we can.
We give away and make things.
We spend time and cash. - mismatched deathbed confessions
“We thought it was a
hoax, and we were wrong.” “We still
think it’s a damn hoax.” - impeachment was just the beginning
Indict the former
president. Hold him account-
able for his crimes. - the listicle is life
The 50 greatest
years of my life, ranked by joy,
wins and shock value. - the gig’s up
Swipe right for soulmates,
cab drivers, dog walkers and
food deliverers. - celestial indicators
Somewhere is a live
dashboard tracking your every
good deed and bad thought. - a pileup of words
Read or cook dinner.
Read or binge-watch. Read or take
a nap. Read or skim. - invasion of the moths
Corner by corner,
room by room, they stake claims on
our territory. - youtopiatube
Five hundred thousand
channels to wile away the
idle days of youth. - the disposable army
The most menial
of tasks for the least pay for
the richest tyrants. - pandemic paradox
The worse the sickness,
the more we gather without
any precautions. - raise the clotilda
A slave ship returns
to the Bama port after
a lengthy detour. - beyond open mic night
Comedians who
goof on TikTok, tweet trendy
jokes and live next door. - chocolate chip champion
Her prowess with a
mixer and batter grew with
every batch she baked. - the nature of hobbies
An element of
frustration becoming its
own perverse pleasure. - six more months of covid
Fauci pops out of
quarantine and spots shadows
of anti-maskers. - it came from craigslist
Zones where barterers
can meet without getting mugged
or shot in the face. - gamestart
A reality
show pitting hedge funds against
day trading neckbeards. - virtual laggard
A bot filled in for
me for a bit. No one had
noticed or minded. - the battle of january 6
Marauders hell-bent
on toppling democracy
and hanging its reps. - the donald j. trump presidential library
The pee tape and the
“Access Hollywood” tape, found
inside Cell Block D. - a new job in the pandemic
Please report to your
manager in the kitchen
via your laptop. - weaponizing bullshit
An empire of
media and hucksters with
greedy intentions. - transactional family
Quid pro quo, scratching
of backs, greasing of palms, an
incestuous trade. - the first lesson of black history month
Those who cannot re-
member the Black past are con-
demned to repeat it. - techwar
Fighting spam, malware.
Computers were supposed to
make lives easier. - catch me inside how bout dah
We think we have the
virus figured out. It then
rolls out new guises. - cupid as warden
Raise a glass to the
relationships that endured
12 months of lockdown. - minimum wage leads to
Minimum food, health,
gas, clothing, stability
and maximum stress. - two clichés and the truth
Being precise means
steamrolling all distractions
to thread the needle. - ol’ reliable
The steady belief
that everything will last as
long as hope’s alive. - the rotting underbelly
Beneath the veneer,
a soul badly in need of
deep understanding. - the doctor on duty
Healer risks it all
to save lungs from the global
menace behind masks. - do-si-dont’s
Even the smallest
ingredient shows proof of
exploited children. - rip moms and pops
Who lent a hand to
the struggling small business when
the pandemic struck? - binge spectating
The secret joy of
reading about TV is
skipping those clunkers. - a perfectly cromulent verse
Using slang can be
dangerous since it’s always
boodling the watchet. - the wanderer
She found it easy
to pick up and move, swanning
to untouched locales. - the data detective
Where had it gone off
course, this trail of zeroes and
ones landing afield? - temporal madness
To not sleep, to push
and push through hours and days
with no set schedule. - that one driver
Cut someone off in
traffic, watch them tail you till
home to cuss you out. - a not-so-simple delivery
Hunting for common
items but unable to
fill the shopping cart. - goin’ off the deep end
Friday night is here.
Time to plan all the great ways
to spend a weekend! - a muse bushed
Creative writer
seeks inspiration for the
next set of verses. - a walk through the woods in winter
Bundle up and brave
the cold. Head for the trails to
commune with nature. - rumble in the cubicle
Not even the grumps
at the office can keep me
from smiling at life. - 1 zzzzz
She passed out before
counting, so the sheep snuck off
very quietly. - two-thirds awake
A third of our lives
in bed. A third of our time
shrouded in slumber. - you’re gonna need a bigger bed
To be cuddled by
a pack of warm furry friends
is to know comfort. - nocturnal visions
A surreal melange
of made-up memories and
dreamy wanderings. - the 140-hour workweek
So refreshing was
the long winter’s nap that she
slept for two more days. - a miracle in a vial
We can destroy a
tiny bug by shooting up
folks with a vaccine. - discommunication
Email, Slack, phones, fax,
texts, voicemails … and yet colleagues
can’t seem to connect. - wires crossed
Don’t give in to the
IT desk. Turn off, turn on,
defenestrate it. - natural neglect
Weeds and rodents have
claimed this fertile ground. Can this
garden rise again? - probably apple and peach
Anyone could tell
that the translucent bag had
a mess of fried pies. - kids, covid and contagion in education
The physical toll
on those in classrooms, mental
toll on those at home. - out and prodigal
Never too old to
run away from home, but to
return is tougher. - at least the billionaires are thriving
The people are stuck
with no income, and the jobs
may never come back. - and you’ll like it
They celebrated
their hard-working staff with some
cake and empty praise. - caucasoid cachet
A diverse group of
employees politely clapped
for white promotions. - the two seasons
It’s spring, nope it’s still
winter. It’s spring! Nah, winter.
Please let it be spring. - somewhat after the fact
How many times in
life do you get to bequeath
your stuff? Oh, right … none. - mired in greatness
Is the challenge of
diversity recruitment?
Or bold ideas? - pledge to our selves
We make time for the
things that are important to
us, no matter what. - forget the gas pump
Nowhere to be, no
one to meet, a driveway with
an abandoned car. - a zoom to remember
It is lovely to
spend the night getting older
with virtual friends. - native advertising
I’m at my best when
serving others. I have a
lot of love to give. - the online introvert
He could take the chit
chat for only so long. He
logged off in a huff. - frugal milestones
She celebrated
her newfound wealth by paying
off her auto loan. - my own postal route
I get plenty of
exercise taking others’
mail to their houses. - so long, suckers
They would turn their backs
on nonbelievers, as their
community shrank. - cleverness masked as decorum
A sharper wit can
allow you to speak ill of
the dead with a smirk. - the joke’s on all of us
Fake news, voter fraud,
QAnon, alt-right, Fox News,
vaccines, Russian tweets. - needling around
Get a third shot to
be extra safe and extra
autistic. JK!!!! - the asian in asian american
A minority
modeled on racial divides
and no acceptance. - sunday starting over
The promise of a
rebirth for all, a fresh start
from our sinful pasts. - asian persuasion
Not every person
of color gets asked “Where are
you from?” Lucky us. - the creepy uncle
They took down an old
predator, but it took great
courage and candor. - self care 2021
Taking off work clothes
(pajamas) and slipping in-
to a nice coma. - the persistent undercurrent
His mellow moods were
betrayed by a beautiful
depression deep down.
• • •
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