a very special election
Thursday, December 14, 2017 by Wade Kwon
It’s shocking what a
few hundred thousand voters
can achieve as one.
• • •
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Wade’s 101: Haiku retrospective 44
Wednesday, December 13, 2017 by Wade Kwon
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- fanfare for the working man
No vacations, no
rest. In this country, every
day is Labor Day. - wing it and smile
Their plans were simply
to hang out and see where the
day and night take them. - the day the dream died
The only country
they’ve ever known is sending
them far, far away. - a tiny step of faith
It takes some courage
to care. About someone else,
a cause, a friendship. - paintings and knickknacks around the block
The artists set up
shop in bodegas and bars
and crowded storefronts. - the reckoning
Mother Nature came
to collect on all debts, past,
present and future. - grizzly hug
I hold her tightly
so none of the affection
slips away from us. - peak anxiety
Money woes, watching
weight, spousal tiffs, work headaches
and a wobbly faith. - hurricant
The depression limps
closer. Even the storm is
tired of raining. - kids today
With their selfies and
their avocado toast and
their vocal fry. Feh! - abuse your illusion
Are we taking steps
to live our dreams or faking
it as usual? - should’ve ordered moscow mules
A snowflake and a
cuck walk into a bar. They
gag on White Russians. - hypocritical oaf
He asked others to
stop posting political
junk. Then he does it. - unending embrace
I hold on tight to
her with all the love I can
muster. I hold on. - the end of privacy
Eventually,
the hackers get our eighth grade
diaries and rhymes. - caravan of crazy
Slowly winding up
the interstate, yelling at
each annoying jerk. - hand in hand, step by step
We take time to mark
the little milestones as we
share the path forward. - woman’s best friend
Her sidekick wanted
nothing more than a few pats
and full loyalty. - shakacon
Nerds would gather to
discuss the finer points of
picking up Klingons. - unregulated monsters
Supervisors looked
with disdain at free spirits
who slipped through somehow. - keeping score by the decibel
Shouts rang out up and
down the street as each team’s fans
groaned and cheered their fates. - teach to the test
Learn to fill in those
bubbles in the allotted
time or get left back. - politicize everything
Let no gesture go
unremarked and no statement
go undissected. - before the notification bell
An announcement on
their relationship status
was being crafted. - be labor
Each hopeful waited
to put their time and their back
into a day’s work. - the check isn’t in the mail
The mailbox was a
yawning chasm of sordid
promises, no hope. - the instruction manual
Out the birth canal
and into the world and then
into the cold ground. - the incoherent stranger
She came a’babblin’
to the funeral service
with pillows for shoes. - the crank
Once confined to the
basement, the crabby gent ran
for a Senate seat. - loves horses and her boyfriend, too
She’s a good girl, loves
her mama. Loves Jesus and
America, too. - the cost of doing nothing
While we bicker through
the same arguments on the
same issues, folks die. - the nicer dollar store
The nicer dollar
store has better things on sale
and fewer crime scenes. - pearl power
After 12 years, I
still get a thrill when hitting
the Publish button. - a partner in prime
We take on the day
with no agenda other
than to laugh out loud. - going to unchurch
Worship football. Pray
to brunch. Honor thy binge watch
and thy extra sleep. - modern political discourse
Angry tweet, then a
gif meme, racist comments and
whataboutism. - co-bucket list
Whatever we do,
wherever we roam, we seek
the funnest of fun. - the coolest festival on earth
He would sail down to
Antarctica to sing to
the penguins and seals. - medium-distance relationship
They traded sexts by
erotic semaphore to
let their freak flags fly. - no quarters necessary
Tap keys and grow plants
and zap spaceships and rock hard
and score lots of points. - the healing power of puppers
The world is toast. But
at least I can look at dogs
on the Internet. - natty nuptials
The bride wore a pearl
strapless gown with beaded trim.
The groom wore a tux. - race track report
The cars turned and turned
and turned and turned and turned and
turned and turned and turned. - no more facades
I want to be my
best self and my worst self for
the one I adore. - to the bunkers
Are there really good
people still left in the world
or are they hiding? - movie night
We sit close in the
dark, hand in hand, eyes on the
screen and each other. - cupcake gigante
In the small pan rose
a small cake. A small knife spread
a schmear of icing. - months to live
The doctor put down
her charts and broke the bad news
with a steady voice. - country music staples
Trucks, Jesus, women,
beer, dogs, heartbreak, the outdoors,
Mama ‘n’ Daddy. - a rapist in the making
He thought nothing of
his many suggestive texts,
his whispered come-ons. - not too many followers
My cult is a weird
mishmash of clean eating and
freaky solo sex. - burn it all down
Abusers always
have a way of finding blame
for all except them. - boo all day every day
Nothing is scary
enough for Halloween when
life is a horror. - imaginary numbers
How do we measure
the unmeasurable? How
do we count fairies? - custom costume
A sword and pointy
ears and boxing gloves and a
princess-y cone hat. - at the moment before death
Life is a series
of dumb video clips that
flash before your eyes. - make america weird again
We drink Mountain Dew
screwdrivers for breakfast and
eat breakfast at night. - hard candy halloween
A ghost tried to warn
kids about the dangers of
plaque and gum disease. - the color of hate
Terrorists come in
all shades: white, white, white, white, white,
white, white, white and white. - that’s the way love goes
The confusion that
comes with budding amour grows
my anxiety. - the unfairer sex
Men, with their grabby
hands and lewd remarks and cruel
attitude. Xwhy? - the fortune teller’s creed
Uncertainty breeds
anxiety. Better to
know bad news up front. - sunset in the afternoon
Night begins as soon
as lunch is done, and the drive
home slinks through pitch black. - the biggest dragonfly ever
A lone drone swoops through
the park weaving through tall trees
and dodging frisbees. - when johnny comes limping home
A nation sends its
young to war, then leaves them to
pick up their own pieces. - when one become two
We lie awake, side
by side, wondering what the
other wants in time. - modest riches
Bills paid, flat fixed, new
toaster, new underwear, cash
for fast food takeout. - feed the trees
The paperwork to
reduce paperwork is held
up by no paper. - for god and country
They risked it all for
apple pie and the Amer-
ican way of life. - ode to a beard
The scraggly friend who
cleans up after meals, gives a
tickler to faces. - after goodbye
The beating goes on,
a solitary thump. The
heart wants what it wants. - tis better
Love isn’t lost. It
hides in the crevasses of
the poor broken heart. - the march of time
Six more weeks till a
new year. Six more hours till a
new day. Keep trying. - hushed skeletons
Cruelty is silence
smothering the victims of
sexual violence. - let us now praise infamous men
They built careers on
stellar reputations and
silent survivors. - hole foods
I should eat more fresh
vegetables, he thought as he
munched on a doughnut. - t-shirt curls
Sometimes, the workout
is getting into the right
outfit to sweat in. - vacancy
The empty spaces
in my heart used to hold some
very dear partners. - the perfect thanksgiving meal
Buttered toast, popcorn,
pretzel sticks, jelly beans and
an ice cream sundae. - agenda of entitlement
Are we doing all
we can to shame sexual
assault survivors? - all you can gorge
Have we eaten all
we can? Eat more. Have we thanked
everyone? Thank more. - black every day
The middle class spent
their last dollars on super
bargains made abroad. - shun local
The old shopkeeper
braced for the impending wave
of no customers. - garden raiders
Vermin creep through the
rows of tender seedlings in
search of freebie food. - wisdom of the crowd
Sometimes the angry
mob with pitchforks and torches
is exactly right. - sensible names for pets
Constance, George, Wilma,
Matthew, Irwin, Fran, Justine,
Luther, Kate, Danny. - let’s get rid of
Nazis, gaslighters,
colluders, sex predators,
tax dodgers, bullies. - an open secret
Everyone in the
office knew he was a cad
but kept it private. - a big eastern syndicate
Christmas isn’t a
season or a warm feeling.
It’s raw consumption. - trauma on the reg
Every time she peeked
online, she re-lived horrors
from past and present. - thirdhand
They say you never
get a second chance to make
a first impression. - demotivational speaker
Inspirational
quotes couldn’t match the murmur
of cruel depression. - and on earth peace and goodwill towards some
That uncle on the
Facebook won’t stop jabbering
about foreigners. - party before country
We drank from the cup
of wretched excess before
dozing in the woods. - you can’t spell iambic pentameter without i am me
Can we find ourselves
in a poem? Can we learn
from these brief verses? - shade to come
The hot new color
for next year is called Putrid
Melancholy Brown. - work harder not smarter
Employees will keep
their efforts at a work-life
balance to themselves. - never too early to campaign for votes
In 3 days, this dumb
election will be over
and on to the next. - blizzard alley
Our flaky climate:
It snows more often in the
South than days gone by. - never underestimate the power of
Voters, but also
money, corruption, lying
and stupidity. - in a pear coulis
On the first day of
Hanukkah, my rabbi gave
to me … a latke.
• • •
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Vote 2017: Alabama Senate special election results
Tuesday, December 12, 2017 by Wade Kwon
Video: Doug Jones’ victory speech on Tuesday in Birmingham
Hallelujah it’s over! Results from today’s special election for U.S. Senate in Alabama …
More election coverage in our Vote 2017 special report.
(Updating throughout the evening.)
The expected voter turnout statewide was 20 percent to 25 percent. The actual turnout was a whopping 40 percent.
Chart: Voter turnout
Click for full-size version
Winner in red
Tweets
This just in on Twitter …
This is hilarious, his form sucks & that horse was thinking about bucking him pic.twitter.com/NLWfm8QtlY
— Molly (@Molly_Kats) December 12, 2017
In case you missed this. https://t.co/ITeIV73DMa #alsen #alpolitics
— MontgomeryAdvertiser (@MGMAdvertiser) December 12, 2017
Multiple Alabama voters got this email this afternoon from AL Democratic Party: “Make a plan and vote tomorrow.”
State party tells me this email was sent yesterday and they’re checking what’s going on. They said 2 new emails were sent today saying today is Election Day. #ALSen pic.twitter.com/MppiIptcoy
— Lauren Walsh Hamilton (@LaurenWalshTV) December 12, 2017
BREAKING: Democrat Doug Jones wins election as U.S. senator from Alabama. @AP race call at 10:23 p.m. EST. #AlabamaElection #APracecall
— The Associated Press (@AP) December 13, 2017
— Matt Scalici (@MattScalici) December 13, 2017
This year the Trumpiest of the Trump states gave @realDonaldTrump two losses. First, he backed Strange and Moore won, then he backed Moore and Jones won.
— Kyle Whitmire (@WarOnDumb) December 13, 2017
https://twitter.com/frankpallotta/status/940795085221965825
Made Alabama Great Again!
— Randy Yates (@randyajax) December 13, 2017
Visit the Birmingham, Ala., page on Facebook.
• • •
More Vote 2017 coverage.
Vote 2017: Jones, Moore and a rapt nation awaits
Tuesday, December 12, 2017 by Wade Kwon
Video: NBC News report on the Alabama Senate race
No one could have predicted this.
What was once a sleepy December special election to fill a vacant Senate seat in a deep red state has turned into a national referendum on political parties, sexual harassment and the Trump agenda. Merry Christmas, Alabama.
It all started a month ago with a bombshell Washington Post report citing several Gadsden women approached as teenagers for dates while Roy Moore was in his early 30s. One woman accused him of sexual assault. Moore is the twice-elected, twice-removed Alabama Supreme Court Chief Justice on the Republican ticket.
(Or maybe it all started when then-Gov. Bentley picked then-Attorney General Luther Strange in February to fill Jeff Sessions’ Senate seat after Sessions was appointed U.S. Attorney General.)
National media, pundits, celebrities and at least one late night talk show host have descended on this one-race ballot for 4 weeks. Money has flooded in, turning a surefire Republican victory into a free-for-all, complete with nonstop commercials, flyers, rallies, high-profile interlopers and poll after poll after poll.
Alabama has had an interesting fall.
Oh, and Doug Jones is running for the Democrats. Almost forgot.
At least in 12 hours, this will all be over (save for any voting machine malfunctions, calls for recount or nuclear war).
The polls are open: Voting takes place till 7 p.m. for this one race.
Q: Where do I vote?
A: Call Jefferson County: (205) 325-5550, Jefferson County (Bessemer only): (205) 481-4105, Shelby County: (205) 669-3913.
Or Search Your Polling Place on AlabamaVotes.gov.
Wade on Birmingham:
election results tonight
Remember, if you have problems at your polling place:
- Notify a poll worker immediately.
- Call the state attorney general at 1-800-831-8814 from 8 a.m. to 5 p.m. today and Wednesday.
- Call the secretary of state at 1-800-274-VOTE (8683) or visit StopVoterFraudNow.com.
- And tell the probate court for Jefferson County (205-325-5203) or Shelby County (205-669-3713).
- E-mail us at Vote2017[at]wadeonbirmingham.com.
Q: What can I expect to see on the ballot?
A: Here it is …
Q: What if I need a ride to the polls?
A: Try Carpool Vote, a free service that matches volunteer drivers with voters who need a lift.
Let us know where and when you voted, and how many votes were cast before yours.
• • •
More Vote 2017 coverage.
never underestimate the power of
Tuesday, December 12, 2017 by Wade Kwon
Voters, but also
money, corruption, lying
and stupidity.
• • •
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The Birmingham channel: Ballers and brawlers
Monday, December 11, 2017 by Wade Kwon
A look at Birmingham in videos …
Trussville evangelist Karen Schatzline appears on a November episode of “Sid Roth’s It’s Supernatural!” From Heaven Visit.
•
Just another Thanksgiving night at the Galleria (our vertical video of the week). From the AIO Entertainment.
•
Highlight reel for Sparkman senior guard Anthony A.J. Horton, filmed in Pelham. From Hoop Brothers.
•
Dashcam footage of the Bessemer Super Highway. From Real Karma.
•
Basketball: Birmingham-Southern at Roanoke in November. From Roanoke Athletics.
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Football highlights: UAB at Florida in November. From ESPN Gainesville.
•
A glimpse of the Body Worlds Rx 2016 exhibit at McWane Science Center downtown (our other vertical video of the week). From Large Marge.
•
A fun outing in Birmingham, including a meal at Cracker Barrel. From Madeline Hart.
•
A simulation of the Bernards’ back yard. From Platinum Pools Texas.
•
Checking out the sites at Red Mountain Park. From Gowestusa.
Navigating the Hugh Kaul Beanstalk Forest at Red Mountain Park. From Cristiano Fontes.
•
Miss USA Deshauna Barber speaks at the UAB Leadership Conference in October at the Hill Student Center. From Deshauna Barber.
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Mexican band La Arrolladora Banda el Limón performs “Me va Pesar” in November at El Sol on Valley Avenue. From Cristy Bazan.
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“Face the Nation” report from Birmingham on Senate candidate Roy Moore. From Face the Nation.
•
Steve Roberts performs “Red Mountain” at King’s Way Church in Irondale. From King’s Way Church.
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Another virtual Birmingham. From Wise Era Trill TV.
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A talkative peacock at the Birmingham Zoo. From Wesley Redinger.
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Rapper Lisa K. performs “Anomaly.” From Lisa K. Music.
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The gross toilet at Target (our other other vertical video of the week). From Large Marge.
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Daphne Chamberlain, assistant history professor at Tougaloo College in Mississippi, talks on “The Jackson Movement and Birmingham,” at the 2017 Institute for College and University Teachers in June in Jackson. From Fannie Lou Hamer.
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Birmingham hip-hop artist Rocki performs in November at WorkPlay in Lakeview (our other other other vertical video of the week). From Deavin Napoleon.
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A 60m hurdles race at the CrossPlex in Five Points West. From Rashni Walker.
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Playing at the Thunderbolts Five Star Exposure Tournament in November. From Rik Kinghorn.
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Members of UAB’s Indian Cultural Association meets world traveler Abhishek Kumar Sharma in November. From Abhi: Around the World.
•
Hiking the Ridge and Valley Trail and Overlook Trail at Ruffner Mountain. From Gowestusa.
• • •
Send us links to your videos. | More videos on the Birmingham channel.
blizzard alley
Monday, December 11, 2017 by Wade Kwon
Our flaky climate:
It snows more often in the
South than days gone by.
• • •
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#sundayread for December 10, 2017
Sunday, December 10, 2017 by Wade Kwon
Photo: Io. Lagana (CC)
My picks for #sundayread for December 10, 2017:
- How celebrities blog these days
- The Doctor Is In. Co-Pay? $40,000. By @NelsonSchwartz
- Prozac Nation Is Now the United States of Xanax, by @AlexWilliamsNYC (RT @HDuggalMD)
- Y’all Connect: If action movies can evolve, so can our corporate storytelling
- Is it unethical to cash in on women’s reproductive capacities? By Sharmila @Rudrappa (via @FCCBastrop)
- 88 days trapped in bed to save a pregnancy, by @Katherine_Heiny
- Flashback: Consistent communication is important. So is shaking things up.
- Park honors those who helped sick Irish in Toronto in 1847, by @MisterJohnDoyle
- The Invisibles: The cruel Catch-22 of being poor with no ID, by @PatrickMarion Bradley (RT @vsisson13)
- Flashback: Y’all Connect – How do you stand out in the digital world?
- Actress Rose Marie on Telling Off Sexual Harassers in the 1950s and Tweeting, by @RachSyme
- “Willing to Do Everything”: Mothers Defend Sons Accused of Sexual Assault, by @anemonanyc and @ReadChristina (via @LiekeMuller)
- Child Protective Services runaways in Houston caught in a troubling cycle, by @MonicaRhor
- My fashion nationalism, by Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie @AdichieSpeaks (via @kikiochieng)
More posts from Wade this week:
The latest #sundayread tweets:
- More #sundayread recommendations from me
never too early to campaign for votes
Sunday, December 10, 2017 by Wade Kwon
In 3 days, this dumb
election will be over
and on to the next.
• • •
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work harder not smarter
Saturday, December 9, 2017 by Wade Kwon
Employees will keep
their efforts at a work-life
balance to themselves.
• • •
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shade to come
Friday, December 8, 2017 by Wade Kwon
The hot new color
for next year is called Putrid
Melancholy Brown.
• • •
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you can’t spell iambic pentameter without i am me
Thursday, December 7, 2017 by Wade Kwon
Can we find ourselves
in a poem? Can we learn
from these brief verses?
• • •
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party before country
Wednesday, December 6, 2017 by Wade Kwon
We drank from the cup
of wretched excess before
dozing in the woods.
• • •
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and on earth peace and goodwill towards some
Tuesday, December 5, 2017 by Wade Kwon
That uncle on the
Facebook won’t stop jabbering
about foreigners.
• • •
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The Birmingham channel: Follow the bouncing balls
Monday, December 4, 2017 by Wade Kwon
A look at Birmingham in videos …
“Fantasia for Karen Alone,” written by Dorothy Hindman and performed by Karen Bentley Pollick. Recorded in 2010 at the Birmingham Museum of Art downtown. From Stuart Diamond.
•
“Subcarrier” episode with Birmingham rock band Holy Youth performing at Saturn in Avondale. From Subcarrier.
•
“Young Blood: Art in Our City.” From UAB Media Studies.
•
A look at the columbarium at Homewood’s Trinity United Methodist Church. From Trinity UMC.
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A trip to Vulcan. From Life in Bama.
•
A walk through the Birmingham Botanical Gardens. From Sir Howard Productions.
More at the gardens. From Deirien Howard.
•
Angela May of the Birmingham Museum of Art shows the re-opened Dutch wing (our vertical video of the week). From De Museum Docent.
•
Basketball: Wenonah at Ramsay in November. From Christopher Cooper.
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Belladonna Magazine third anniversary party. From Belladonna Magazine.
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Birmingham Kickball Allstars vs. the Tragic City Rollers. From Cardboard Titanics.
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Birmingham-Southern senior Bridget Adams’ recital in November. From Liz Dial.
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California rock band Lukas Nelson and Promise of the Real performs in November at Saturn in Avondale (our vertical video of the week). From Kim Bourgeois.
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Clip from EWTN’s “At Home With Jim and Joy” with hosts Jim and Joy Pinto of Fairfield. From Spiritual GPS.
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Columbus, Ohio, rock band Starset performs “Telepathic” in October at WorkPlay in Lakeview. From Stephanie Amber.
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Commercial for the Birmingham Water Works. From Josh Director.
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Drone footage of construction of a HealthSouth facility in Birmingham From Wayne Degan.
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Erian says thank you. From STAIR of Birmingham.
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Football: Centre at Birmingham-Southern in November. From Centre Athletics.
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Having fun in Birmingham. From Kabell987.
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Highlights of the Center Point Eagles. From John Dysart.
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Los Angeles band Voz de Mando performs “Muchacho de Campo” in November at Rancho El Centenario in Mt. Olive (our vertical video of the week). From Tito A.
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Mario Addison, North Birmingham native and defensive end for the Carolina Panthers, delivers more than 250 turkeys for Thanksgiving. From Alabama NewsCenter.
•
Mustangs vs. Red Storm in a November softball tournament. From Frankie Upchurch.
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Promo for Birmingham band Bonus Round. From iMusicAcademy.
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Promo for the Auburn Community Church gathering in November at South Highland Presbyterian Church in Five Points South. From Nathaly Marques.
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Republican Senate candidate Roy Moore speaks in November at the Birmingham Marriott on U.S. 280. From Live Satellite News.
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REV Birmingham’s 2012 name announcement. From REV Birmingham.
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Rolling downtown. From Jackson Ross.
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Showing off at the Saturday morning Cars and Coffee at Hoover Tactical Firearms. From Sinister.Shelby.
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Skateboarding under the Red Mountain Expressway. From Faith Skate.
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The 1991 Iron Bowl at Legion Field. From Alabama Historian.
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The documentary “Lives of Courage, Voices of Hope: Women Seeking Freedom and Justice in a World of Black and White,” on Alabama women in the civil rights movement. From the Media Center @ SU.
•
This year’s Veterans Day parade downtown. From National Veterans Day.
The Spyder Ryders in the parade. From Michael Cozzi.
More from the parade. From Jcargus.
Even more parade footage. From Life in Bama.
Evening fireworks for Veterans Day over Red Mountain. From Tim Smith.
• • •
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